My Simple Beautiful Life

The Legacy of an Adopted Child

2011-12-19T20:37:00.000-08:00

My birth mother gave me this poem a few years ago. She is an amazing woman - who gave me life, and let another help me live life. I am blessed everyday to have been raised the way I was.

One there were two women
Who never knew each other.
One you do not remember,
The other you call mother

One gave you a nationality,
The other gave you a name.
One gave you the seed of talent,
The other gave you an aim.

Two different lives shaped,
to make you one;
One became your guiding star,
The other became your sun.

One gave you emotions,
The other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile,
The other dried your tears.

The first gave you life,
The second taught you to live it.
The first gave you a need for love,
And the second was there to give it.

One gave you up,
It was all she could do.
The other prayed for a child,
And God led her straight to you.

And now you ask me through your tears,
The age old question through the years;
Heredity or Environment,
which are you a product of?
Neither my darling,neither;
Just two different kinds of love.

just tears

2011-12-18T21:46:00.000-08:00

I wrote a post last Sunday - my post of the month. I wasn't feeling it. I was holding back something. I wanted to write something profound, it didn't work out that way. I wanted to express the emotions I have been having, but couldn't. I'm not sure why. Im not sure tonight can be any better, but Im going to try.

For whatever reason, I feel more blessed than ever before. I cry...DAILY...at ANYTHING. Commercials, stories, songs, kind words, thoughts... You name it, I'm crying.

Tonight I read a old friend/neighbors post about the star on her barn at home, how it signified a homecoming, and the beautiful song that she wrote with her brother before his passing in December 2003 in a skiing accident. I bawled like a baby. I can't get it together. You can listen to her song here:
hilltopstar.blogspot.com

Life is so precious, and I feel as I have taken it for granted. It seems that every day I hear a story, a sad story, of someone struggling through life;physically, emotionally or mentally.

Some of you may have heard about sweet Allisa Berry. See her blog here: http://hopeforallisa.com/updates/ . I found her blog just last Monday. ALL day I couldn't help but to think about this sweet girl and her story. I had no clue who she or her family were but felt I needed to do something. I took flowers to her Monday night, by myself. I met her, we talked. I felt her amazing spirit. Being in the Berry's home, only for a few minutes was something I needed. I find myself each day thinking about Allisa - how she is so aware that she will be leaving this earthly life, yet she is prepared to meet her maker. Her parents asking not for a miracle, but simply our prayers.

How I would love to know that I was prepared to meet my maker. To know that I had done everything that was asked of me.

We almost lost Jaysons mom this year to Pancreatic Cancer, and just this last week she went back to work. She is determined to make every day count - to live EACH day to the fullest, and enjoy everything she is given. She is a strong woman, and won't go down without a fight. She is such an inspiration to me. I am amazed every day by her, and her choice to live!

I hope that my family and friends know how truly grateful I am for there friendship. How I value living in this beautiful land, surrounded by good neighbors. I am grateful to have been raised by such wonderful parents. I feel so very lucky to have my four siblings (who listen to me, all the time) and to have married into such a great family.

Now I ask something of you - please, pray harder for those in need today. Remember those who are struggling, and who need a helping hand. Take a moment to tell someone how they have impacted your life, and made you a better person.

Merry Christmas

It's the most wonderful time of the year -

2011-12-11T22:49:00.000-08:00

and the busiest...

I thought as the kids got older, things would slow down. No chance of that here! I finally wrapped a few gifts tonight. My closet was getting a little crowded. and then - I found more hidden gifts - oops!
I told Jayson NOT to let me buy anything else. Holy Schmoly. My kids have enough shit, and I just keep buying more.
however - why are men so hard to buy for. and why, I ask, do they have to be so damn expensive! I can get all three kids DONE for the price of one of the things Jayson wants. but...then he says "I don't want anything babe, just you." Okay - you can wipe up the throw up now. He's getting so cheesy in his old age. ( I wont lie, I kinda like it).

I do, however, feel very blessed tonight.
Joslynn ran off the road on her way to her grandmas tonight. Only about a mile down the road, through a fence on my Dads property. She said she remembers looking down and then loosing control of her car. She missed the telephone pole, hit a fence post that somehow came out of the ground, and went just over the winsdhield, through TWO fences, and only cosmetic damage to her car. She was pretty shook up. When I looked at all the posts she missed, I knew she must have had an angel with her. No way should she have not had more damage to her or the car. The scratches are deep, the passenger mirror is missing, both headlights are broken and she popped a tire - but she walked away, and Jayson drove the car home.
I feel so blessed that she is okay. Not sure how soon she will want to drive again - but Im okay with that!

It's amazing how quickly we forget the small things. How lucky we are. How blessed we are.

I don't like my job right now. AT ALL! but...I keep telling myself, in this day, Im lucky to have a job. Im grateful to not be struggling financially through life. I have a beautiful home, with a wonderful family. I have my faith, and my savior.

I love Christmas. I love everything about it! But mostly, remembering why we celebrate. It is, the most wonderful time of the year!

Happy Holidays.

squeeze your loved ones once more today.

thankful

2011-11-06T10:41:00.000-08:00

As I walked into church I noticed a thankful tree. It encouraged us to take a leaf, write a thought of gratitude, and place it on the tree. During relief society, the lesson was on gratitude. We went around the entire room each stating a thing we were thankful for. I don't think a dry eye was in the room. I began to think of all the things that I have in life that make each day wonderful.

My thankfulness today is for the gift of the atonement. This year, has been like no other for me. It started in January when I made the choice to go visit with my bishop and talk with him about things I had been holding onto for years. Things that go back to my youth. Things that I felt I needed to come clean of. I visited with him for hours. And then visited with Jayson about my choices to repent of my past, do what was asked of me, and become worthy to go into the temple and come closer to my father in heaven.
Jayson then told me that he wanted to do this with me. I wasn't prepared to hear that from him. We decided together that we would begin the journey to make our family an eternal family. Many prayers, tears, struggles and spiritual gifts have been a constant part of our family since then.
This past year we invited the missionaries to come into our home and help us learn more about our savior and the eternal blessings that we can have. They have been in our home weekly, and have become more like family than anything. We have grown to love them, and anticipate each of the visits we have with them. They often stop by just to say hello and grab a treat (because we always have treats at this house). The spirit they bring into our home is amazing.
We are getting closer every day to our eternal goal. It has been hard. I keep reminding myself that in the end, Jayson will be there with me.
I am thankful today...because I can be! (even if Jayson did work all day, and is now paying more attention to the Steelers game than me).

Beautiful Heartbreak

2011-10-30T08:32:00.000-07:00

I've said it before, I will forever continue saying it.
I miss my mom.
For the past two weeks I have been sick. Sicker than I have been in a LONG time. I called the Dr. on Friday, and got another round of antibiotics.
I haven't cloroxed walls, dusted, de-cluttered, finished laundry,scrubbed the shower, or "deep cleaned" not one damn thing in two weeks. I feel like my husband and kids are big enough and responsible enough to complete these tasks - but that hasn't been the case.
Joslynn is busy been a teen/senior. Jayson is working 60+ hours a week, and no sooner comes home, showers and goes to bed. Addy, my social butterfly has a friend or a project going at every moment, and Ashton is practicing his Nitro Circus tricks on his motorcycle.
By week two I was getting a little resentment towards my family.
Im still convinced I became sick due to stress from the sale/transition of Riverwalk.
FINALLY, on Wednesday I was offered an official position with the new company - included were a raise and a sign on bonus :) I should be happy - right?
Nope - Im too busy feeling sorry for myself.
Yesterday I went with my bestie to help take formals of my sweet Jordan Mair. I've babysat her since she was a baby. I LOVE the entire Mair family. I couldn't be happier that she is getting married, in the temple. Watching them take pictures in front of the temple, and be so excited that in 10 days they would be there, together, sealed to each other for eternity was so exciting. However (yep, here comes the woe-as-me)after dropping Jordan and Kris off I just started to cry.
I know my turn will come, but it is taken what seems like FOREVER! I want more than anything for Jayson and I to be sealed for eternity. It can't happen soon enough, but unfortunately, the ball is in Jaysons court, and he is just holding the damn ball and wont shoot!
I walked in the door - just in enough time to say good bye to Jos and she went out the door with Mr. Wonderful. Ashton and Addy were downstairs playing, and Jayson was sitting on the couch....watching TV (grrrr) NOTHING had been done in the 5 hours I had been gone. N-O-T-H-I-N-G!
...
last night, while Jayson was at work, I finally put away 2 weeks worth of laundry, cleaned the bathroom, and loaded the dishwasher. I was a little bugged that not one more thing had been done all day.
...
I got upset, and quick - then Jayson threw out some ass hole comment, and I ran into my room crying.
and then....I sat in my room and cried, and then I just wanted to run away. and then I wanted to call my mom so she could make it all better -
but I can't
dammit I hate this!
why can't we just CALL heaven?
why did she have to go?
why can't I just put on my big girl panties and deal with it?
...
and then this morning, this was the first thing I saw.
talk about answers to a prayer.
I know my heavenly father listens to us. I know that he will help us. I know that he wants only the best for us. And yes, I know that sometimes, I can't have everything I want.
This song is beautiful! It is JUST what I needed this Sunday morning.

I know we are each given our trials - to learn from and make us stronger. I can only hope that I can remember to count to ten before I blow up - and remind myself that this is my life. I am in control of what I do, how I react, how I speak and what I say.
My day will come, I know this.

Happy Halloween

2011-10-19T22:17:00.000-07:00

Personalize funny videos and birthday eCards at JibJab!

Expressions of Love

2011-10-14T06:39:00.000-07:00

Just one of those days that I love my chewbacha more than ever!

down by the river

2011-10-12T22:50:00.000-07:00

Im gonna try to make this simple...

I manage apartments in Logan, Utah

EMG OWNS and MANAGES Riverwalk Apartments

I work, as a manager, at Riverwalk Apartments for EMG

EMG is selling the ownership of Riverwalk

ICG is purchasing Riverwalk

ICG will NOT (as of today) be using EMG as the management company

Riverstone will be MANAGING Riverwalk, OWNED by IGC

Riverstone will hire me as a manager

I WILL STILL BE AT RIVERWALK, just with new owners and new management co.

NO ONE from Riverstone has talked to me about working for them (pay, benefits, ect.)

I am stressed

The "closing" will happen first week of November

I get a "bonus" for staying with EMG through the sale...because...ITS A PAIN IN THE ASS! I have wanted to leave my keys on the desk and walk out at least once a week for the past month.

It will be better

breath in, breath out

hell, maybe I'll get a raise :)

for sale

2011-09-20T22:56:00.001-07:00

My emotions that is.
I watch fellow bloggers, and find it interesting what others are blogging about. For some It's only pictures, with just a few words. Others, fine writing. For some, it's a business tool. For me - well, I think It's where I put my deepest emotions. I don't think to just blog about the happiness. I turn to it as a journal entry. And honestly - over the last few months I haven't been writing because I wasn't sure I wanted to show my raw emotion to the world knowing that others read this. I have seven drafts saved - and haven't put a one of them out here. So here's the skinny - I think when I write I daydream that I'm writing to my mother. All the things I can't tell her because she isn't here. All my sadness she used to fix for me. All my tears she would wipe away.
Friday is her birthday. I miss her more every year. I was too young to loose a mother. My children were far to young to loose a "maree," and my father was robbed of the love of his life.
I often say that baking is my stress relief. I believe that. When I was younger, I remember my mother in the kitchen. Making wonderful things. Preparing for some special dinner, and making sure the table looked just right. As I grew, and after her stroke, he cooking went a little south - but it's the thought that counts, right?
so tonight - Im letting some of the hidden emotions out.
please forgive me
stop reading now
or read on...
but you have to promise to comment, it gives me warm fuzzies.

THE KIDS:
Joslynn; it seems like it has taken forever to get where we are. You always told me one day she would appriciate all that I did. I think maybe, just maybe I see that now. She turned seventeen in August. still no licence, and not much drive to get it. She has had her permit since last August. BUT...finally, Monday, she got it. The look on her face was priceless! and then today, her orthodontist told her she might just get her braces off in two months, after two long years. Her comment: "look ma, Im growing up." It melted my heart. She is going to Homecoming this Saturday. The dress...beautiful! Makes her look all grown up too. And then, the reality that she really is a senior, and might just leave this house - well, It breaks my heart. I've loved that little girl like my very own since the day I met her. All I've ever wanted her to feel is loved.

Addy; geesh, when you said she was just like me, you weren't kidding. Sometimes it breaks my heart. I know what I struggled with - and see her going in the SAME direction. She turned eleven on Sunday....and...(TMI) started her period tonight! I can't even stand it! I got super upset with her Saturday night about not sharing, and then had to run to Maceys to grab the groceries for her Sunday birthday dinner. When I got home, she had left a note on my bed. The note that makes you feel like the worst parent in the world. The "Im sorry I make you so mad, I know you wished I was never born" note. And then It dawned on me. We are a family because of her. If I had not have gotten pregnant, who knows where Jayson and I would be today. I quickly went into her room, gave her a big kiss and told her how much I loved her. She misses her Maree just as much as me. Her Maree was her very best friend. When she's having a bad day, she tells me a tea party with Maree would make it all better.

Ashton; This little man is the light of my life! His beautiful eyes looking at me, telling me he loves me. He was my angel straight from heaven. It took me forever to get him here, and I knew he would be my last. Every little thing he does I embrace. I probably need to get triple insurance coverage to cover what he'll do in the future - but I love that he has such an ambition to get out and enjoy life.

my chewbacha;I've put this man through hell and back - and he still comes home to me every night. He loves me. He loves my entire crazy family, and he would do anything for me. We have grown so very much over the last twelve years, I can't imagine what the rest of time will be like. I KNOW one day, we will promise eternity together. I know he is trying. I know the devil sits on his shoulder. He has a past that had him dead by 25, and now - well, life is just beginning. Alcohol is a nasty poison, one of the hardest Im sure. But I know he can do it! I know we can do it together - for our family. For us. For himself.

church; I have NEVER felt this close before, yet so far away. When I don't go, Im empty. Something is missing. Something doesn't feel right. The minute I walk through those chapel doors, I am calm, at peace. I know I'll make it - one step at a time!

family; where to start...MaryLou was diagnosed with terminal Pancreatic Cancer in March 2011. On June 17, she underwent a surgery (the whipple procedure) that would hopefully remove this cancer. (talk about modern technology). After 18.5 LONG hours in surgery, the procedure was done, and well she is cancer free. However - She's not out of the woods yet. The recovery has been anything but easy. After having every side affect possible, rehab, and more - she came home on Sunday. I still don't think she's even 40% - but she's not giving up! We all knew what this would/could do to her. We all know that she may still not make a full recovery. But, we love her, and are NOT ready to give up the fight!
my family; Elizabeths baby was born July 17, five weeks early. Only weighing in at 5lb 11oz. Today, 2 months later - she's weighing in at 8lb 11oz. We love her so much! Luckily for Aunt Maggie, I live next door, and get this little angel quite a bit. I am so lucky to be apart of her life.
My Dad - bless his heart, has Elizabeth, baby, boyfriend and Kevin living at home with him. I KNOW there is a special place in heaven for him. I enjoy taking him dinner at night, and Sunday afternoons. I get pretty emotional when I talk about how amazing I think my father is. Its as if I don't even have words to describe what I feel. He has had things happen to him that no man/boy/son/brother or father should have to go through. But his trust in the lord, that with this, all things shall pass, is simply amazing. I love him. I am so lucky to have been given him.

the job;AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!!!! Riverwalk is selling within the next 30-45 days, and at this point, the new owners will be using a new management company. I have been offered a position with them, and will be able to stay in my current position. BUT - Im not excited. It's like interviewing for a job that you never turned in an application for. I feel forced to make the change- a change I am not prepared to make. What If I don't want to do it anymore? What if Im done? I would LOVE and I mean LOVE to be doing something that I have passion and dreams about. Not so sure that passion and dreams pay the bills though. Reality is reality, and sometimes dreams just have to wait.

I feel blessed every day I come home through the doors of MY home, greeted by MY kids, and see my smokin hot construction worker. Im lucky. I know that. But I still have bad days.

I miss you mom. I didn't know it was possible to miss you more every day. I miss our chats. I miss your smile. I miss your funny clothes. I miss our trips to town. I miss your advice, and your kind words. Happy birth day.
i. miss.you.
every single day!

shit, damn and hell

2011-08-22T21:38:00.000-07:00

These are my three favorite {naughty} words. I say them a lot. My Dad once told me the were "legal." I'm gonna stick to what he said.
Today was a shit, damn, hell.....and.....a few more words kinda day.

thank you!

2011-07-12T12:33:00.000-07:00

It's amazing how something as simple as a facebook "Happy Birthday" can make you feel so dang important. I have the bestest friends in the whole wide world.
THANK YOU to all of you. It's just goes to show that you never know how something so simple can make someones day.
I don't expect much on my birthdays, Im too old for that. But just the words "happy birthday" mean someone was thinking of me.

Since my mom passed, my father has taken up baking (just a few things)and one of them is Magic Cookie Bars. My entire family and extended family loves the little pieces of magic(I love the crusty little edges most). Two years ago, my sweet Dad went into Kitchen Kneads and bought one of those brownie edge pans. Each year for my birthday he comes over when Im not home, and sneaks it out and makes me my own individual pan of magic cookie bar EDGES. Seriously - Best Dad EVER! see - SIMPLE things make me so happy!

After my moms funeral, my Dad made comments about how he noticed that certain people he thought would come didn't. At the time, I think It hurt his feelings. Im pretty sure that since then, he has gone to almost every viewing of people he knows. Sometimes, It creates awkward moments, telling someone you barely know how sorry you are - but on the end - all they will remember is that you showed them support.

It taught me a valuable lesson to never under estimate the power of your being. I can't tell you how many times someone elses smile, facebook/blog comment, or text has made my day. THANK YOU to all of you who have made my day feel so very important.

yackity smakity

2011-06-14T21:53:00.001-07:00

I tend to blog, late at night, when I can't sleep, because I have WAY to much on my mind.
Here is to yet another bloggidy blog;

1. One week from now, I will not be able to sleep. Why? Because I will be anticipating waking up my little angels to get on a 9:05 flight outta here, to the beautiful coast of Oregon for and entire SEVEN days.

2. I feel that I deserve this vacation more that anything right now.

3. I just completed unit inspections at my property. What are these you ask? Twice a year, I have the joy of inspecting every single one of the eighty eight apartment homes on the property I manage. Some units are pleasant, clean, and smell of fresh Clorox. Others, well, they leave dog shit in the bathroom so that you can step in it! Yes, dog shit. and fresh at that. And yes - I made her take my shoe, and wash it off! AND yes, I gave her a warning notice. I can be a real mean landlord at times.

4. My property is for sale. It has been for sale for all six years that I have been managing it. However, this is the first time that it has been listed with an active broker. I have three appointments in the next three days to "tour" the property. The potential sale could mean a few things for me. A. New owner will purchase the property, but continue using EMG (current employer) as the management service. B. The new owner will NOT use EMG, but will hire me to continue managing the property for them. and C. I will no longer be needed at Riverwalk.
This entire concept is very hard for me right now. It makes me very emotional. I have no control of the situation, and just have to put on my happy pants and smile. I do not like knowing what is going to happen. I like "plans."
Honestly - I can't imagine working for another management company besides EMG. I know people change jobs all the time, but I am happy where I am. I enjoy the people I work with. I love my residents, and the property I manage. Some of the residents have become like a second family to me. I spend 40+ hours per week getting to know them, personal information. I have watched some of those children grow up, and graduate. I have held a mother, as she watched her baby pass away. I have listened to them, consulted them, helped them deal with there child's sexuality choices. I have cried, laughed, and learned with my residents. How could I leave that? As much as I whine about them, I truly love them. I can honestly say that I know each and every resident by name. (Well, maybe not the Burmees ones, but that's because the names are so dang hard!)
The sale and outcome of my property are mostly out of my control. My choices will placed before me, and I will have to choose. Of course - the best option is A. I pray that EMG continues to be the management company on the property - if not - be warned of the complete anxiety attack! (yes, I do have meds on hand)

5. My babies are growing up. I even cried thinking about Joslynn being a senior this next year. She has become the most beautiful, strong young woman. I am proud of the choices that she is making to helping her achieve eternal happiness. Addy made me promise to take her to the Barn Dance last Saturday night. She put on a skirt, and away we went. Her "crush" asked her to dance and she declined because she was nervous. Luckily she got brave and asked him before the night was over. Ashton begs and cries for either a dirt bike or a four wheeler every night. My little dare devil is gonna be the life of me.

6. We have been attending church as a family and the missionaries have been coming to our home. This is a HUGE step not only for Jayson, but our entire family. Jayson and I have talked our entire marriage about making "better choices" for our family. Were still making changes. I am so thankful for the blessings of patience that our Heavenly Father has given us, and that he has with us. Jayson and I both still have a long way to go - but the light is closer than it has EVER been. Jayson talks about the day he will drink his last beer.....it's just a talk right now, but one day it will be a reality. I can only expect him to move at his own pace. Elder Hall and Elder Williams have been such a blessing. We love having our visits with them. I can't even begin to explain the spirit and peace they bring into our home. Watching the children, and Jayson participate brings such joy to me. I am learning so much about myself, things I never knew. I tend to make this about Jayson - but really, I need it to.

7. I have the most amazing friends, ever! We have this little group that we spend most Saturday nights with. Jayson calls them his "Saturday warriors." This last Sunday, two of the families came over after church, had lunch/dinner with us, and spent the entire afternoon/evening her at our house. We cleaned up, made treats, watched the game, played outside with the kids, watched the kids "put on a play, " and went for a very short walk :) My warriors are my strength! I can NOT imagine where I would be right now without them. My weeks are not complete when we don't see them. I feel as if I need each and every one of them for an individual purpose.

8. My dad is the greatest! Just giving him a little shout-out. Growing up, he was ALWAYS working to provide for our family. He taught me that hard work didn't come easy, but the outcome is rewarding. I loved working with him on the farm, and getting life's lessons from him. I'm pretty sure the "birds and the bees" was demonstrated doing AI on a cow. I can guarantee you this - thinking that having a child meant some dude was gonna put on a glove, and shove his entire arm up me was not a pleasant thought. I stayed clear of boys (for awhile). But seriously, to this day - If I need advice, a shoulder, or a fathers blessing, my Dad is there for me. I am so grateful to live so close to him. I am so lucky that my children can ride there bikes to the barn yard, or hop in the swather with him when he's working the fields. He is an inspiring man. Keeping positive and looking forward, and always having words of wisdom.

As I have been writing my thoughts of the day,I can't help but to feel grateful. I am so lucky to have a good job, good friends, and close family. I am so lucky to be in love with my best friend. I am blessed to have three beautiful children. I am even grateful for the one dog, one lizard and three goats (PS. Roofus is leaving - he's mean to the ginny goats). I am thankful for everyday that I have to spend with the people that I love. Life is too short not to.

Laugh harder, love stronger, forgive quicker, and hold tighter.

CTR

2011-05-15T22:19:00.000-07:00

It's been over a month since I last posted something here. I was feeling very down, and didn't want to portray my negative attitude here. I was trying to get to a better place, mentally. I sometimes feel if I just let it all out, then I feel better. Each time I would sit down to write, I felt that my attitude was too negative, and I should keep it to myself.

Today, I felt spiritually uplifted. Today, I was positive. Today, I was blessed.

Today, I slept in. I wanted to go to church, but I didn't want to get up. I came out into the kitchen to find Jos ready for church.
We've been talking A LOT about choosing the right - and here I am - NOT choosing the right. She looked so dang cute, and simply suggests that we go to our old ward, since they start at 11. What a little angel!
I am so grateful that we went. It felt good to be welcomed. It felt good to be missed. And the lessons today were just what I needed. Patience with our children, and missionary work.
I have been blessed having Joslynn in my life. She has taught me so much. I won't deny that being a step mom carries its challenges, but all in all - I'm pretty lucky!
Whenever I get a little mother daughter time with her, It reminds me how much I enjoyed talking with my mom. I wont deny, I probably talk more than I listen - but I am working on it.

Jos- I love you. I am so very lucky to have you. I can't imagine for one minute what my life would be like without you. Thank you for being and example, to me and our family. Your dad and I are so proud of the choices you are making, and the person that you are. You are the bomb.com :)

Self Doubt

2011-04-08T11:14:00.000-07:00

"Any experience can be transformed into something of value. Everything depends on the way you look at things. You cannot have the success without the failures."

I'm having a rough day , so please forgive me. I am trying to take the quote above, and make today better.

My maintenace man QUIT today - no notice - it's snowing - and I have an inspection on Monday.

I manage a property with 88 apartments. One Manager, One Maintenance - thats it! I have no back up. I have no one to pick up someone elses slack.

I am pissed

It's Spring Break, and I have not done one great thing with my kids.

Jayson got sent home early "rain day." - and now - he's going to hang out with the guys at The Owl for lunch.

My kids are home

I am pissed

I want to scream

I bribed a tenant that I would take his late fee off if he would shovel the walks

I have gone through FIVE maintenance guys in five years - I beginning to think it's me.

My boss told me not to take it personal

Im taking it personal

I feel overwhelmed

I will be okay

I just needed to vent

If you are aware of any QUALIFIED MAINTENANCE people, who would LIKE to work FULL TIME (or part time seasonal), please have them send a resume to Riverwalk Apartments @ 753-5404

more {extended} family...friends

2011-03-26T22:41:00.000-07:00

This post is a shout out to some very important people in my life, my friends!

You know who you are, or at least you should. You have done something, at some point in my life to be my friend. Maybe my mother made us be friends when we were little. Maybe we were neighbors. Maybe we were in the same class. Maybe were related, but more like sisters than friends. Maybe we worked together. Maybe our children are friends. Maybe, just maybe you don't even know what you are to me, but I will call you my friend.

To my oldest, and dearest friends - Becky and Kaehla - I can't imagine what life would have ever been without you. My childhood and who I am today is because of you.

To my cousi-ster - I still love you even if you made me play horses when we were little.

To my favorite neighbors EVER, and my "other" family - The best three years a person could ever have, on the corner of 9100 south. I still wish Steve would have just burnt the house down, and we would have stayed!

To my high school bestie, Tammy - Every good story about getting in trouble involves you! :) Thanks for always being there, even to this day.

To my old roomie, and the best damn hair stylist - Lacee, you are the BOMB.COM!

To my co-workers (past and present) - this ones for you Miken - I love what I do because of people like you. You make the everyday interesting.

To my fellow blogging buddies - I can't thank you enough for the love and support a simple comment shows. KarKar and Jess, I'm sad we waited till after HS to make this friendship, and feel so lucky to have it now.

To the parents of my sons best friend - THANK YOU! I love having you and your family in my home. I love that we have become such great friends all because of 2 little dudes. I can't wait for the adventures and future that we will share together!

To my future daughter-in-laws parents - I can not express enough my gratitude to you. I am who I am today because of you! You were brought into my {and Jaysons} life for a reason.

I feel SO BLESSED tonight to have wonderful people in my life. I am full of such emotion and gratitude. YOU my friends, are AMAZING!

I have an amazing {extended} family

2011-03-19T08:14:00.000-07:00

I LOVE my family - husband, children, parents and siblings - but this post is about the {extended} ones.

AUNTS AND UNCLES: I was blessed with these wonderful people the day I was born. Growing up, I spent a lot of summer months living with my aunts (moms sisters). My cousins and I took turns exchanging families. I gained such a great bond with my cousins, and we are still close because of it. We spent many hours riding bikes, playing in the canal, and even delivered newspapers one summer.

My Dads sister, Judy, has become another mother to me. My children love her, we love going to her home, and we love having her family in our home. We went to see Gnomeo and Juliet with her, and she surprised me with a cute little frog and gnome statue for my spring decor. She is so thoughtful, and always doing things {making cupcakes for Jayson, because they are his favorite, taking doughnuts and chocolate milk to the barn on Saturdays, having princess parties for the neighborhood, and the infamous Easter Egg Hunt} just because. I love you Judy. Thank You!

{detour......after my mother passed away, I gained better, stronger, more valuable relationships with quite a few people. I wished I would have done it sooner!}

My moms sisters call often, just to check in. I LOVE talking with them. As most of my Beutler cousins can attest to, they (the sisters) have the most genuine, sweet, kind spirits. They speak only of good things, and with a positive insight.

My GREAT Aunt Onie, will be 94 next month - but if you ask her - that means she will be in her 95th year. She lives just 4 blocks from my corporate office in Salt Lake. I enjoy visiting with her when I am in Salt Lake, after my meetings. You would never think she was a day over 29. I admire her strength in life, and am so grateful that I have her.

COUSINS: My mother had four sisters, and my father had two brothers and two sisters - so - I have a large family, with LOTS of cousins, and I love it! I also love that facebook keeps me updated with them since we have all gotten a little older, and busy in our own lives.

We celebrate the 24th of July in North Logan with my moms family. The cousins {Michelle and MaryAnne} decorate a float for the parade, and then all of our children get to ride, and throw candy. The North Logan 24th of July parade is the best! Wonderful community floats, and not so much advertising. We then have a fun filled afternoon in A. Maries backyard. Last year, we had a bounce house and a snow cone maker. Great memories are made, lots of laughter, and even games of family history.

IN-LAWS: I've only got one set, and I couldn't ask for anyone better. My in-laws are AMAZING. Jayson comes from a home with three sisters, therefore, I am the favorite daughter in law. :) Jay and MaryLou welcomed me with open arms, and have never made me feel less that one of their own. We are so very blessed to live so close to them, and have a strong family bond. Jaysons extended family is not as close as mine - but when the sisters get together, it's a blast. Lots of laughter fills the room, and we pack 'em like sardines so we can have giant sleepovers. Christmas Eve is usually spent with Jaysons family. We ALL get together, and have one great big sleepover. Nothing like thirteen kids opening presents on Christmas morning.

I just wanted to write a little note about how grateful I am to have these people in my life, the {extended ones}. Each and every cousin, aunt, uncle and my in-laws has done something, said something, or given me something that I hold very close to my heart. I am so blessed to have been brought into such a wonderful family.

whoa nelly

2011-03-08T14:32:00.000-08:00

My blog sucks - I mean seriously. I just looked at the past few posts - and let me tell you - don't bother.
I do not usually think of myself as a "seasonally depressed" person - so I'm not sure if it's the season, day, time, month or year - but I'm just not 100%

I went tanning this past week - twice - IT HELPED!! So, I went again, and bought a 10 punch pass. Something about that hot bed makes me feel better. I was turning a little albino for my own liking. I feel better bronzed. My job doesn't allow for a lot of outside time, or sunny days at the pool.

My house - dirty. We've been somewhere every weekend for the past month - and I can't keep up on the house. We finally stayed home last weekend, with NO PLANS. I made home made pop tarts (so yum) and THE BEST BREAD EVER! Time consuming, but delish! I used to cook a whole lot more - but not latley. and baking is my detox. I should bake more.

Weight - I hate it when my fat pants wont fit! I mean seriously - I HATE buying anything bigger than what is in my closet right now. SO - I should prolly get my a*# to the gym! Weight goes on, it comes off, pants fit, pants wont zip up. BLEHHH! I hate body image. I hate buying "bigger" clothes, but I hate not looking good in whatever I am wearing. I refuse (and would get fired) If I wore sweats all the time. so - I bought 2 new "bigger" shirts. I HATE big boobs! And every time I gain weight - It goes there first. How I wish I could be a nice size C. I found the cutest shirt at Maurices, and couldn't have even fit ONE boob into it if I had wanted to.
Today is Mardi Gras - Jayson asked if he gave me some beads if I would show him my boobs- bleehhhh. Who even wants to look at them?

Kids - Jos is enjoying life, and is happy - but her grades SUCK! So - do I let it slide, because It's not worth the fight? Do you take away what makes them happy? (We have tried that NUMEROUS times, It didn't work).
Addy - shes a mini me - bossy, in charge, mothering - and she is loosing friends because of it! She cried last night because "everyone makes fun of Addy." I don't know what to do. YES - she is dramatic! YES, next week it will be something else, or someone else. But how do I help her NOW?
Ashton - too young to have problems :) and "he's a man."

Marriage - I have decided that Jayson is pretty wonderful! Yep - after 11 years of marriage, I am admitting out loud that I think he' s great! I usually don't tell him, because his ego swells. He is actually pretty amazing. I do wish SOME things were different, but I love what I got! :)

so - a few personal comments later, I'm feeling better. whew, thanks. My bestie told me that she thought she was negative - because she was negative for a month - a bad month - and now that I think about it - IM FRIGGIN NEGATIVE! I should really stop! I have so much to be thankful for. okay - Im done! Only happy thoughts - we'll at least for 24 hours.

any cheap, overnight, fun, exciting anniversary ideas?

a month early...

2011-02-23T10:35:00.000-08:00

My nephew Kyle and his wife Maddie are at the hospital - waiting for baby Avery Michelle to arrive. She was due March 25 - not for another month! We are so excited for this little one.

I'm a little bummed that we will be in Rexburg this weekend, and wont be able to see her for a whole week...

I'll post a pic as soon as I get one!

were gonna party...

2011-02-10T10:22:00.001-08:00

I LOVE parties, I LOVE having people at my house, I LOVE making yummy treats, and I LOVE having a reason to be busy. SO - How about, I host another PARTY???

THURSDAY FEB. 17

Open House 6-8

*Jewelry from Kim Wright

and from Bella Me Boutique...

*Jeans/Capris

*Purses

*Hats

*Shirts

*Belts

and more...

You can check out Bella Me Boutique on facebook, and see what she's got. Kim Wright will be doing the jewelry. It's a what you see is what she's got - so GRAB IT FIRST! :)

I hope to see ALL of YOU - your friends, neighbors and relatives.

a thought...or 2 or 3....

2011-02-08T14:16:00.000-08:00

Outside my window right now... Melting snow and sunshine.

I am wearing..."work clothes" Dress slacks, that I wish fit looser, and a ruffle shirt to hide my under ruffles.

I am so grateful for... Footprints. I know that someone is holding me up right now.

I am thinking... I should go tanning - I wasn't this white when I was 9 months pregnant.

I am creating... Ideas for couples Bunko at my house this weekend

I am missing... My mom, always. She always had a smile and good advice

One thing I love about my job right now... I work with amazing, talented, positive women.

I am hoping and praying for... My children to grow strong and spiritual

From the kitchen... Preparing items for our Family Home Storage Prep class tomorrow night

One of my favorite things... freshly cloroxed walls

My love... my husband, children and food

TODAY... It's a beautiful day, things are good, kids are happy.

My Hero... my father. and not in a cheezy "he's my dad" kind of way. He forgives, forgets, and remembers what is important.

My friends... Truly amazing and inspiring!

My joy... A house full of laughter.

This blog ... a place to write thoughts, vent frustration, and gain positive insight.

My future... only time will tell ...

should I make Lemonade?

2011-01-27T06:20:00.000-08:00

The saying when life gives you lemons....

Well, I found the most awesome little cookbooks ever that say you should make Lemon Poppyseed cake, and baking does calm my soul. However - I think I might just have to deal with this one.

My 24 yr old, un-married little sister is having a baby. She is EXCITED, I am worried. I haven't slept much since the news. She has a boyfriend (baby's daddy), and he is also excited and supportive. I should be too.

I was 19 and pregnant, working 2 jobs and had a shotgun wedding. Were still here after 11 years in March. Marriage is hard enough just learning about each other -no less starting right off with a baby.

Elizabeth wants me to support her, I am struggling. Good thing for big sisters, Jennifer went to the doctor with her. Dr. confirmed she is 14 weeks. Due in the heat of July.

If you know my family, or my sister, maybe you understand my concern. I love her very much. I want her to be happy. It's just hard.

Please say a prayer for her. Pray that she will be healthy and safe. Pray that this sweet little one will grow healthy inside her, and grow to full term.

Pray for me too.....I think I need them too. :)

FYI - My blogging buddies are the best. You have NO IDEA how much you inspire and help me daily. I love the comments you leave me, helping me to be a better person, and know that we all have rough days. THANK YOU!!!!

Happy Thursday

when I get bored -

2011-01-23T16:06:00.001-08:00

Family

Valentines/Love

I don't love this, at all...but I made it, and it took 10 minutes

Used old scrapbook paper, and had the kids help me cut out different shaped hearts

(this one is for SALE! )

All of these, Just for fun! :)

Gray November Day

2011-01-19T08:26:00.000-08:00

It is not a gray NOVEMBER day, but it sure is a gray JANUARY day - and my mother loved them. I think November is the hardest month for my father. I never understood why she loved those "ugly" days. This past November I reminded myself that my mother loved everything and everyone. She saw the good in others that no one else did. Maybe she never really loved those gray days, she was just making the best of what we had.
My mother taught me a lot about making the best with what we had. We weren't rich, but I never thought of us as poor. We had a home, we had love, and we spent time together. Family was important!
In memory of my mother - I will try TODAY and every other day to keep my chin up, and try to make the best with what I have, no matter what it is!
We miss you mom, everyday! Love you, to the moon and back!

I'm feeling crafty...

2011-01-12T14:04:00.001-08:00

I stayed home Monday with a headache. I can't stay home alone and do nothing. Sleeping off the headache turned into a Valentines garland, and internet searches of some cute easy to do decor.
...

pictures this weekend...

I know, your so excited!

I can't wait either :)

Tis the season

2010-12-31T10:30:00.000-08:00

Who made it possible to have four holidays one right after the other? I mean seriously - we don't have anything from July 4th, and then Halloween, Thanksgiving,Christmas and the the NEW year?

and...

the tears wont stop.

1st - NO, I am not pregnant. YES, I wish I was. NO, we can not have anymore.
2nd - It's the holidays, and I miss my mom more than EVER!

Jan 19, almost 4 years ago, my mother passed. I don't cry as often, I don't visit the cemetery as much. I can talk to Addy about memories and smile instead of crying. But, The hurt and pain never goes away. My mother and I were close. We spoke everyday, multiple times. She calmed my sole like NO-ONE could. She reminded me often of how precious life is.
For whatever reason, I can honestly say I think this year has been hardest yet.

....

I am LDS. Born of full Jewish decent. Adopted by a wonderful, religious LDS family. I was baptized. I made mistakes. I graduated seminary with only 2 years. I was pregnant at 19. I am still married to my babys daddy. He is inactive. IT IS HARD! I do go to church. I do believe. I do know whats right and wrong. I hate going to church without Jayson. I know what I am supposed to be doing. I don't always do it. I want to go through the temple. I am scared. I want to go with Jayson. He quit chewing. He still drinks. I haven't paid my tithing for awhile. I don't take the sacrament. I don't feel worthy. I burst into tears when I kneel to pray. I don't remember the last time I prayed. I don't read my scriptures. Do I bring the spirit into my home? Do I teach my children the right way? My actions speak WAY louder than my words. I don't think I taught my children the real reason for the season this year. I cried myself to sleep Christmas Eve. I feel guilty.

I have a hard time talking religion - why? I'm not sure. Maybe it's that I am aware of my true deep feelings. Maybe I know who is reading my blog, and don't want to offend anyone. I have had Bishops tell me to leave Jayson, wait and go to the temple with him, and go without him. My Dad, who was a Bishop, and who "is my dad" probably gave me the best advice - maybe I should just listen to him :)

With the New year only a few hours away, I giggle at the New Years Resolutions. I mean seriously, If you couldn't loose 20lb last year, how ya gonna do it this year? Why do we have to put dates on things we need to change? Jayson had been trying to quit chewing for YEARS, and finally, when he got his tonsils out in October, he HAD to quit! So maybe, we should do things just because we HAVE to, not because 2011 is going to be the fantastic new beginning.

Things happened in 2010 that I LOVED! Things happened in 2010 that I wished never happened. I can't take back the things that happened, I can only learn from my mistakes. They make me stronger. They teach me who I am. They teach me about others.
The only promise I am making in 2011 is to be more patient, love deeper, forgive quicker, listen harder and live each day as it is the last. Life is to short to hate, and not forgive.
I am grateful every day for my husband, and I don't tell him enough. He works hard, everyday for his family. I admire that he has worked for the same company since the day I met him. He respects his boss, and those above him. He loves his family and respects his parents.

However, I do wish that he could be on Percocet every day - he is an awesome cook, housekeeper, organizer, and even a little emotional! :) I love you babe - but the percocet did make you a "better person." lol!

My children are amazing. I can't imagine life without all three children. I wish I could stay home with them, but that day will come. I wish I had three more - but I love what I have!

So, here's to another year of wonderful memories, old friends, new friends, adventures, tears, joy, laughter, work, living and MY SIMPLE BEAUTIFUL LIFE!

HAPPY 2011, may it only bring us happiness and joy!

It sucks trying to be perfect

2010-11-18T21:11:00.000-08:00

Sometimes we just have to cry for ourselves. Ya know - like throwing a two year old tantrum. Today was one of them. Sometimes it just feels as nothing can go right, and I want to stab everyones eyes out with my favorite pen.

I feel like I try hard to remain positive, and only think of the bright side - but dammit - today I didn't want to.

It all started when I left my tooth at home. Yep, my tooth. Remember I had one pulled, and have a "flapper" until my gums heal. I was on my cell phone at home, got distracted, and walked out the door, still on the phone. (I talk better without it in) - got to Maceys and had to turn around, because I sure as hell ain't going t work with out my tooth!

Then...

Some old, and I mean OLD guy came in today looking for an apartment for his granddaughter...then sat across from my desk for the next hour telling me how I should give her a better rental rate because she is a 22yr old single mother with a 2 yr old, and a retired Marine. Ya - do the math, figure out that retirement. AND - that he is the richest man in Cache Valley, but this economy is gonna flop in two years, and he appreciates me working full time so he can collect his Social Security check. I finally had enough, and asked him to leave....after another 30 min, and me turning my back to him, he got the idea and left.

THEN...social services wants me to give them tenant info on a family that had to have a child removed from the home yesterday. BUT... they don't speak the language they do, and can't understand how to communicate with them. Can you say "warrant?" Duh people! I can't just give out info!

When I thought it was better, I had to come home - but to protect my family and my marriage, I will not give you the details. I will simply state that everyone is in bed but me, tucked in happily, and asleep, and me - well. I am cleaning, doing laundry, and typing out my frustration. It's one of those situations where I feel like the littlest thing has made me just about loose it.

I have anxiety if things are on the counter, in the sink, or in the washer when I go to bed. WHY??? They will be there tomorrow! And another thing. We have Iron in our water - lots of iron. It makes things turn different colors. It makes things smell. It gives me anxiety. If you would like to make a donation to my filtration system, I can set up a pay pal account. My water softener can only do so much. I put a bag of water softener pellets in that sucker every month.

Dear Santa,

Please bring me an iron filtration system. I promise I don't want anything else.

P.S. Thanks for the early present of my Electrolux washer.

Love,

Margaret

P.P.S. I think I will sleep on the couch tonight - because my back hurts, and the couch makes it feel better, and I don't want to accidentally suffocate you in your sleep

Thank you

Love, Margaret

My back does hurt - I think I'll take a pain pill, watch my DVR of Glee, and fall asleep on the couch.

Tomorrow is the 19th. 3 years and 10 months. When I took Dad dinner tonight I just wanted to see you. I miss you! You always made me feel better. You made stupid things seem just that...stupid! There are things in this world so much more important than the dishes and the laundry. I just need you to remind me of that sometimes..... I think you just did .....

....

thank you,

Pay It Forward

2010-11-07T16:38:00.000-08:00

We have been inspired so much the last few months reading the trials of the sweet Sullenger family. There sweet child was taken too soon, and the inspiring part is how graceful her amazing parents are moving forward.

They are calling out for help now, and there is something we can do! They are taking this horrible tragedy an turning it into something good. Read about their inspiring story here:

http://patrickandashley.blogspot.com/

They are taking donations of money or goods to make baskets for parents who go through the same horrible situations, and have to leave their homes unprepared in times of uncertainty. Each basket will hold items of comfort and things that may be overlooked. The baskets will be delivered to Primary Children's Hospital in December, their goal is 100 complete baskets, one in each room.

Joslynn has decided that this is a great Personal Progress Project, and will be seeking the help from our ward and others. Joslynn and I will deliver the items personally to Rexburg in December. I know that they are concerned about food items right now. If any of you are interested in donating items, please contact me. If you want to donate money there is a donation button on the blog listed above.

Here is more information on the project:

http://presleespresent.blogspot.com/

Here is a list of the supplies that will go in each basket:

1 Box of Granola Bars

2 Trail Mix (Personal Size)

2 Goldfish (Personal Size)

6 Fruit Leather (At Costco you can get a box with 48 individual leathers for under $10)

Breathmints/Gum

Small Eye Drops (Visine)

3 Pens & Journal

Fleece Blaket for the parents (47" x 57" OR 42" x 52"- Try and go for the bigger one :)

2 Pairs of Socks (preferably with grips on the bottom)

2 Toothbrushes

Toothpaste

Chapstick

Small lotion (non-scented if possible)

Playing Cards

Disposable Camera

This is an amazing thing to be a part of. Please help us help the Sullengers and the families at PCMC. We will gladly come and pick up any items you can donate - even if it is ONE BOX of Granola bars! ANYTHING ALWAYS HELPS.

THANK YOU!

Cant touch this...

2010-11-05T08:23:00.001-07:00

I took this picture a few weeks ago while waiting to get Ashton and Jaysons tonsils out. It's one of those pictures that makes me giggle.
My little man is 6 TODAY!
...
I was gonna be all funny - but now I'm crying!
...
He's my baby, and he's growing up.
No more babies
...
He is the sunshine in my day

He is a ladies man
He's already picked a woman, and no one better hurt his Rylee!
He's always got his 19 yr old girlfriend for a backup
He gives sweet sugar kisses
He'll try anything once
He loves to snuggle
His favorite color is Orange (because his Dad wears it everyday)
He shot the house with his BB Gun last week under dad's supervision
He wants a turtle for his birthday
His bestest friend is Max
He LOVES broccoli, and "sour salad" from Olive Garden
He has only had ONE broken bone, and no stitches....
He sings along with Lady GaGa
He ROCKS at Wii Dance
He would REALLY like a motorcycle - so he can be on Nitro Circus
He sleeps with me when Jayson is out of town
He loves to share my gum with everyone
His hero is his cousin Kyle
He sings in the shower
He has to spray Axe on before going to school

He is mine

I LOVE him

HE IS SIX!

Happy Birthday Mommas Man.

Bloggers Block...

2010-11-03T19:38:00.001-07:00

I can't think of the perfect thing to say, or the perfect picture with the perfect story....
damn.

Advice...(turn off the music first)

2010-10-01T08:23:00.000-07:00

I just love her

2010-09-25T22:34:00.001-07:00

why do they have to grow up?

celebrate the day

2010-09-23T08:35:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday to my Mother - the one who taught me what's important...

-say my prayers

-wear clean undies

-treat others as you would like to be treated

-Doris Day is wonderful

-practice makes perfect

-take the T off can'T and put it on Try!

-tomorrow will be better

-"papcorn" is good anytime

-your only as good as you make yourself

-maple nut and burnt almond fudge is the BEST ice cream

-there is no boogie man in the closet

-if you ignore mean people, they will go away

-mothers do know best

-I HAVE a beautiful life

-my husband will be perfect, tomorrow

-everyone needs date night

-tomatoe soup and noodles makes everything better

-coke will not put hair on my chest

-it is never too late for a diet coke

-take time

-the art of braiding hair

-appriciation for music

-hard work

-love

-compassion

-women can do anything - but a man is helpful

-respect my elders

-someone is always having a bad day

-never give up

I love you mom!

Just what I needed

2010-09-16T20:22:00.000-07:00

Ten years ago at this time I was getting ready to take the drive to Salt Lake with Jaysons family to pick up his sister Tonja. It was a Wednesday, and I was 12 days OVER due with my first born. I was to be induced on Friday at 42 weeks. We walked ALL over the SLC airport, finding the right terminal. My stomach was so hard, little did I know what was going to happen.
Tonja pushed and rubbed on my belly the whole way home. Jayson and I went to bed about ten. I had the urge to pee around 10:30 -and that my friends is when the flood came.
Jayson jumped up, standing on top of the bed asking what the hell that noise was. I "thought" my water had broke. I wobbled into the bathroom to confirm my thoughts.
We loaded into the car, stopped at my parents to get a fathers blessing and arrived at the LRH at 11:30. I was dilated to a .5, and 0% effaced. My contractions were hard, but I wasn't ready.
.....I'll spare you all the details....
At 10:37AM, September 18, 2000, Addy Lee Gittins; my bald little, short legged, 7lb 3oz, miniature Margaret was born. And, I will add...Jaysons sister held her before me! :) - I love you Tonja!
My little Corra is now ten years old! She cant get to 18 soon enough. I LOVE MY ADDY, but, if you know her, then you will not think that this is a rude comment! She is bossy, in control, outspoken, always right, the princess, sulky, dramatic, picky....HOLY SHIT, she is a miniature Margaret. My parents warned me about this.
Addy is a beautiful. caring, loving, strong, independent, little person. She is going to do something amazing one day. She wants to be a nurse, wedding planner, animal shelter coordinator, fashion coordinator, event planner, restaurant host, day care provider and a teacher "when she grows up." Whatever it is, she will be the best!
She loves her family and friends very much, and is always trying to make someone happy with beautiful pictures and cute little love notes.
Her Mauree was her best friends, and she reminds me every day why it is important to say I love you. Her Mauree taught her so many important things in life, like how to have a proper tea party. Addy had the blessing of spending years 1-4 with my mom. Addy spent every day with her best friend, and has so many great memories because of it. I couldn't have asked for a better teacher/friend.
I LOVE you miss Addy Boo! You came into my life right when I needed you. Thank you for teaching me about life, and what is important. HAPPY BIRTHDAY.....Addy Boo, little miss, Corra, Suzie, sassy pants,short legs, princess pat, bossy mcgee, and our little mother....WE LOVE YOU!!!

Fried Food, Lemonade and the Big Yellow Slide

2010-09-14T16:57:00.000-07:00

UTAH STATE FAIR

I don't think I have been to the Utah State Fair since I was in high school, with the FFA. Im pretty sure we were just going to check out the cowboys. Im still amazed I didn't marry one, a cowboy that is.

Addy is turning Ten this Saturday, and decided that she wanted to go to the State Fair for her birthday.

How did I forget that the fair is ALL about fried food- corn dogs especially? Did you know they have an entire building for infomercial people and a"fresh lemonade" stand at every turn.

We went for the animals too.

Minature Bull, with the perfect curly hair

Sheep as big as the girls. They were huge. I even asked the farmer if they were normal.

Addy and MaKenzie had a BLAST! All day ride pass, Sea Lion show, cotton candy, corndogs, dippin dots, fried pickles, funnel cake, lemonade - I think Im getting sick all over again even thinking about all the things we ate.

And then, the BIG YELLOW SLIDE. I remember this thing from when i was a kid. It is as big and wonderful as I remember. It was amazing. We went down three times. I felt like a young'in again.

Oh, the future of the FFA

We even played some Midway games

The Sea Lion show was fun, especially since the girls got a kiss from them.

TEN hours at the fair was enough for me.

Really, two months?

2010-09-14T13:53:00.000-07:00

Please forgive me, it has been two months since my last post. My name is Margaret, I am a slacker.
Well, not really. Some of you haven't updated in over ONE WHOLE YEAR! I had some help with re-construction of my blog, and now I shall update.

1. PLEASE leave a comment if you even read. Just a hello will work.

2. Addy is turning 10 this Saturday!

3. Next week I am attending The Lion King.

4. We still have dirt for a yard.

5. Jayson leaves me a lot.

6. I have decorated for Halloween.

7. Joslynn is 16, and going to Homecoming next weekend, while I am at the Lion King...we will talk about this later

8. ALL THREE of my children are in school

9. Fall + me = LOTS OF BAKING! :)

10. My dad went to Alaska - HOLY COW!

11. I have gained 12 lbs since this time last year

12. I am going to the gym tomorrow

13. I love McDonalds french fries...hmmm...12 lbs worth?

14. Jayson buried the old grill in the back yard - yes, buried. Dug a hole in the middle of the goats pen, and buried it!

15. We are camping this weekend with Cache Valley Electric, my kids are SOSOSOSO excited.

16. I got a new camera - so pictures next - aren't you excited?

Do you need a good laugh?

2010-07-22T15:09:00.000-07:00

Bittersweet

2010-07-18T07:41:00.000-07:00

I am in a hotel room, typing, crying, listening to my entire family sleep, feeling blessed that we are all together. In the past week I feel truly blessed to be who I am, with a family that I love.
I came across the Sullenger Family Blog this past week. A heartbreaking story of a little girl who fell in the canal in Rigby, Idaho over the 4th. She was life flighted to PCMC, and returned to her heavenly home Friday afternoon.
Another, a child who was born strong and beautiful, and by 6 months had what they determined was Lou Gehrig's. They lost her in December 2009. A "birthday party" was held in Farmington, Ut. yesterday to celebrate, and raise awareness.
And lastly, my sweet friend, and co-worker Melaine Kalis lost her husband in a tragic helicopter accident at the airport in SLC on Friday.
I cant type, I cant make sense, I am just babbling with emotions that I can not type out. I feel blessed and saddened all in the same gulp of air.
Pray harder, love deeper, live stronger.

who wants my man child?

2010-07-13T10:51:00.001-07:00

You can't really have him, my life would never be the same without him! I love this Little Man, he is my last, my only son, and he likes to give me sugar (kisses). He is energetic, silly, and an all American BOY!
He is going to Kindergarten this year, and I am very sad. He is growing up. He keeps telling me to stop feeding him, and he will stop growing.
I am looking for a sitter for this next school year. Ashton will be in morning Kindergarten at Canyon Elem. I need a sitter from approx 11:30 - 5:30, Mon. - Fri. If you are anyone you know would be interested, please let me know. Thanks so much!

Thirty, Fun and Flirty??

2010-07-12T08:50:00.000-07:00

I am 30! I am FUN! But flirty...hell no! :)
Growing up, my grandmother and my mother were forever 29. I have some to the conclusion that as a small child I was taught that I should be forever 29!! I am not 30, I am and will be FOREVER 29.

We had a glitter toe party Friday night. Trish did thirteen sets of toes. She is amazing. The night was full of fun and laughter. Tammy and Melissa were the last to leave at 11:30.

Ashton enjoying the chocolate fountain, looking a bit like Dracula

Even Kyler had fun!

I know...your wishing you would have come and enjoyed the chocolate fountain

Saturday, Addy and I went to a baptism for our friends Brian and JoAnn. It was such a special day for them. We love spending time with the Olsens. It's amazing how quickly you forget how young and innocent you were at 8.

It IS great to be eight!

After, Kaehla and I headed to SLC with Margo for a fun filled evening. We did some shopping, ate at PF Changs, and went on an adventure to the corner for a McDonalds coke...not the best idea we had . Jayson informed us we were lucky not to get shot. For future...

do not go to the McDonalds Downtown on 5th South!

Sunday afternoon, my dad put together a little surprise party for me. Family, friends, burgers, and some GREAT presents. They all thought they were so funny. The Olsens had put together a old lady beautification bag...tweezers, mirror, cold cream, polident, shower cap, hair net, and curlers. My father and siblings gave me a moo moo, depends, and denture cream. I am so lucky to be surrounded by such loving people.

I even had to put on a fashion show!

KarLee and Jennifer made these cute cupcakes and cake for me.

THANKS FRIENDS AND FAMILY for making 30 not so painful!

GLITTER TOES

2010-07-08T13:08:00.001-07:00

FRIDAY NIGHT, July 9

Starting at 6:00

(approx 40 min per person)

Trish Clawson will be doing them. Only $15 per person!

No need to make an appointement...

Just an RSVP!

I'll be setting up the Chocolate Fountain too :)

Please come, bring your daughter, neighbor or friends.

just leave a comment if you plan on comming, or call me.

Hope to see you

(it's my going be 29 forever party!)

What really matters

2010-06-29T09:27:00.000-07:00

FIRST OFF....Why can't I load any pictures onto my blog? Can someone please help me? It's driving me crazy!

I am 1 week shy of a 2 month broken back story.....
On May 6 I "fell" and broke my back. Not anything major, but WOW, what an impact. The computer we have at home was dying,and took to long to even bother logging on. When at work I did what I HAD to and left! It was amazing to me how following my favorite blogs didn't matter, checking facebook, or even logging onto my e-mail became something I didn't care about. The fish in Fishville died, and I was happy. It put a few things in perspective, and I am grateful!
Girls Camp was last weekend - and IT WAS AWESOME! I think the closer it got, I was more excited just to go to camp.
Joslynn went with the 5th yr. girls for the retreat on Tuesday night, and that’s when reality set in. I was going to be feeding 400 members....and Jayson, my helper, was working out of town! Whatever was I going to do?
My father let me borrow "Goldie" the awesome gold farm truck...that I look so stinkin' hot in...To gather all the food. Judy, my aunt, came to the rescue with two large white coolers. Kaehla and Teresa SAVED me Friday morning, by helping shred 100lbs of chicken. I could NOT have done it without these people.
When I was called, they asked if I needed a committee, and I being the person that I am said no. I can do this all by myself. PSHHHH....Note to self...delegation is for a reason! :)
However, what I really wanted to write about was the self learning lesson I have encountered over the past two months.
It all started with the back, then not needing the internet, the fight with Jayson about dirt in the yard, and a final high note at Stake Young Women’s Girls Camp.
Breaking my back was hard, not just physically, but emotionally and mentally. Being told that you can NOT do things, like Saturday Cloroxing aromatherapy is hard for a Type A person. I felt that the walls were dirty, the Zoey hair was in every corner of my house, laundry was not done to my standard, and I couldn't do one thing about it.
Then the dirt...we had the perfect opportunity to get some great top soil to fill in our low spots - and it turned into the biggest pain in my arse! I had to motivate Jayson to go get the dirt, then listen to him complain about driving "farm equipment, "(spoiled CVE boy), then wait for him to follow through. In the meantime he managed to pick up three...yes THREE side jobs that became much more important than me, my house, or my yard. During my dad’s Sunday school lesson I realized that it was what it was....DIRT! Why was I fighting over DIRT? We'll get a yard...one day...and it wasn't worth being so upset over. I let it go - It will happen. Not when I want it to, but it will happen.
I remember when my mom passed away, and the days just before her passing. I had a "feeling." Had I been more spiritually inclined at the time, I would have known it was the spirit prompting me. The emotions and thoughts I had the week prior were STRONG and amazing. It saved me literally. I was calm, the day of and the days after. I was strong! Don't get me wrong....I cried and cried. I screamed at the heavens, I stayed long hours at the cemetery. But, I had a father and children. I taught myself things I never knew I could. My testimony grew. I had a new faith of my religion again.
Over the past three years, I have learned that I am who I am because of the events that I have dealt with in life. All events.
The camp story.
Dealing with a teenager is never easy. Dealing with a teenager who is only 15 yrs younger than you is not easy. Acting like a parent, and not fighting like sisters is not easy.
Joslynn has struggled a little with the move and the new ward, with good reason. We LOVE Paradise 4th ward, and everything about our old ward and house. Moving 2 miles was like moving 2 states. She has a bad attitude about church and Young Women Activities. I KNEW that camp could change that....and it did!
I went up Thursday. As I pulled into camp Lehi, in the awesome farm truck, there was a feeling. Not the bumpy, no shocks, diesel truck feeling....the feeling of peace. Our ward was the first camp site. The girls were working on a craft, happily! Joslynn greeted me with a big hug and I love you. I walked around for awhile, talked with the wards, the directors, and figured out my place for Friday. I hung around, and left just before the gates were locked at 10.
I was so excited to return Friday. The feeling at camp is that of the true spirit, if you let it.
Friday was a little crazy. However, I know that I was blessed and watched over. The entire meal went of perfect. I was calm, cool and collected. We had tons of food, and an amazing devotional afterwards.
We then joined our own wards for testimony meeting. It's always the best part of camp. Remember...all the testimonies that start with "I didn't want to come, and I am so glad I did, I love you girls so much." It's my favorite. But I love listening to these girls doubt there own strengths and beliefs. They are such strong examples to me. I didn't bear my testimony, I was a visitor, and honestly I was scared. But I listened, and I cried when Joslynn told me how much she loved me. I cried when I could feel the pain of the girls who didn't think they belonged. I smiled at those who talked about loving the gospel and the scriptures, and I was thankful that our ward has such GREAT leaders. Thank you, leaders and Young Women, for reminding me what we come from, what we know, and what we believe.
I left at 12:30, I was tired, and still had to get up to do breakfast. I was on a spiritual high. The ride home was extra long, and extra bumpy. I’m pretty sure I fell asleep once, but I made it home safe.
I am so very thankful for the gospel, for my family, and for the things that surround me. I am thankful everyday that Jayson and I both have good jobs, and a healthy family. I am blessed with an amazing extended family, with wonderful Aunts and Uncles who are strong Latter Day Saints. I have the most amazing father, and a wonderful mother who took me in as their own, and taught me right from wrong. I am truly thankful for repentance and the gift that we may one day return to our Heavenly Father. I am blessed to live in such a beautiful place, with great neighbors and friends. I know that I have done wrong things. I know that I have things I need to work on. I know that one day Jayson and I will enter the temple to make our family an eternal family. I know that I am blessed and watched over.
I am thankful for what really matters!

thought(s) for the day...

2010-05-25T15:45:00.001-07:00

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if
I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did
not make any changes to.

14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever.

15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

20. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.

22. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

23. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.

24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

25. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent an ass from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

27. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

28. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber & dumber every year?

29. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

31. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

32. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my behind everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

the blahs!

2010-05-21T10:01:00.001-07:00

My last post, titled "I’m so excited'" and then this are two extreme opposites...but that is how I am feeling!
May 6, woke up early, having a great morning, polished toes, put laundry away, jumped in the shower, shaved, pumiced heels....FELL DOWN, broke back! Yep, how damn stupid right?
Addy heard me (my body coming down on marble is a little loud); she came running, zoey starting barking, I couldn't breathe, and wanted to cry. I somehow managed to get out of the shower and grab a towel, had Addy grab my shorts and a tee - oh, yes, and my cell phone. I called Jayson - that was not helpful! Men can sometimes be SO STUPID (don't worry, he remedies himself later). I got up, got Addy out the door, and then called my Aunt Judy to ask what a broken back would feel like. I scared her a little, she called my Dad, he rushed over - then went back home to grab my little sister to take me to the ER. In the meantime, my sweet friend Kristy came to grab Ashton, and take him to preschool.
The ER took X-rays, and stated that I had a compression fracture (like a pop can), and then gave me and IV of some very, VERY wonderful drugs! :) Jayson drove from 90th South to Logan very quickly, and took me home. I slept for the next three days.
I don't deal well with being "down," It literally gets me down! So...against orders, I went to work Monday - yep...not a good idea! So, in the 2 weeks since - I cannot bend over and Clorox floor and walls (and that my friends is my aromatherapy,) lift, go up stairs very well, or sleep in my own bed. I've been on the couch for two freakin weeks...and I’m done! I put that bedding in the washer this morning, and by damn I am sleeping in my bed tonight!
I slipping into some funk - I can't sleep, I cry, I feel like my house needs me and some Clorox 101, I want to just fell better...NOW! I am impatient and dammit - this was not what I ordered - so take it back! I don't want to burden others with my problems...so I'll write it about it on my blog so you can all see it, right? Whahhhhh, poor Margaret! Okay - REALLY...NO COMMENTS ON THAT, PLEASE!
Last night I took Joslynns friend home, by the old house, the house I love, with the neighbors I love and miss - yep that one. And...I stopped in to see what then had done to the place. It looked great, and they were happy...and me...well I cried nonstop for the next 2 hours! WHAT THE HELL? I have a brand new, beautiful home - with no problems, and I want my old house back! Then I hurt Jaysons feelings by not being happy with what we have...and then...well then... crying + no sleep = poor Margaret blog!
so, really...this is a poor me, I feel so bad for myself, and need to poor out my emotion, whahhh blog....sorry!
But...It does feel better knowing that after writing this I sound pretty flippin pathetic, I need to get over myself,take an extra pain pill, break out the Clorox and finish out my day.
"and with that my dear, I say GOOD DAY!" (what movie line???)

I'm so excited...and I just can't hide it...

2010-05-05T10:50:00.000-07:00

I got a phone call Monday night, not one that I was expecting...I have been asked to be the "food specialist" for Stake Young Women's camp this year. For some of you, this may be a dreaded calling...but this EXCITES ME!! WAHOO!! :)
I get to plan and prepare 3 meals for 250 people...oh the possibilities! I have been thinking non-stop since Monday night. Tonight is our first meeting, and I get to learn all about what I have to do, what is expected, and what I will need to figure out between now and June.
I may be posting ideas here so that you can all give me your feedback - therefore, I will express my thanks now. If any of you have great ideas, let me know. Thanks, and have a great May 5th!

Anniversary Trip - Oregon, March 2010

2010-04-23T11:48:00.000-07:00

Jayson and I celebrated our 10 year anniversary March 28 this year. We wanted to do something fun, yet not too expensive. We looked into a few destinations, and decided on Oregon. As many of you are aware, I am a PLANNER! BUT..not this time! We had our flights, a car rental, five days and a GPS. NO RESERVATIONS! :) This is so unlike me...and I LOVED it!

Multnomah Falls

Crescent City, CA. First look at the Ocean

We met up with Gary and Natasha (my birth mother) in Medford, Oregon. I met up with her in Las Vegas in 2000, and talk to her often. It was great to meet Gary and let Jayson meet her. We had a great time visiting, and I am so grateful to know her.

We drove A LOT on day 2. From Portland to Medford, back to Grants Pass and then over to Crescent City. Thank Goodness our little Ford Escape had Sirius. Jayson made me listen to Blue Collar Comedy for most of the driving time. I don't let him drive - he scares me!

We drove to the "drive through tree" - NOT what I expected at all. It was a great little drive, but not my favorite.

Jayson was a tree hugger, and made me take lots of pictures of him next the the giant Redwoods to show the kids.

I'm so awesome.hahahahah!

My little friend - well call him Oscar. He was out in the ocean, all alone. He let me take pictures of him.

The Sea Lion caves were so fascinating. They said about 350-400 lions were in the cave. The week prior they had about 600. Jayson thought he was a sea lion, and made the "lion call" to them....and me for the next 50 miles.

Jayson was in HEAVEN with his full crab dinner. We found this hole in the wall diner. I don't do seafood - but her homemade pecan cheesecake was amazing!

Pacific City was our very most FAVORITE stop! Jayson was digging through the tide pools until it was too dark. I found this little star fish, and later killed it. It is on our back porch, loosing the sea smell still. Yes, I am a heartless killer! Don't judge me!

Astoria was out last stop. Yep - The ENTIRE Oregon Coast in only 4 days! We are planning to go back next year with the kids. I may have to do a little more planning, and book some hotels however.

Happy 93 Aunt Onie

2010-04-23T09:36:00.000-07:00

My Great Aunt, Ione Andurs celebrated her "94th" year yesterday. She is such an amazing woman! My Aunties celebrated with a temple session, and then to Aunt Maries for a wonderful lunch!

She is the LIFE of the party!

Aunt Marie, Aunt Nan, Aunt Onie, Aunt Janet and Aunt Diane

(my mom's sisters)

Thanks for letting me celebrate with you!

Party Prices

2010-04-02T09:16:00.000-07:00

Tonight is our first party. We hope you are ALL coming. Attending these parties is a great way to sample some of the products, and learn just how easy it is to budget and use your food storage.
If you are un-able to make it tonight, you can still order. Some of the SALE items in April are:

All #10 cans - Party prices in April

Freeze Dried:
Blackberries $25.13- save $8.42

Mandarin Oranges $16.94- save $5.70

Pineapple Chunks $26.37 - save $9.80

Corn $14.47- save $3.23

Potato Dices $14.34 - save $5.11

Ground Beef $31.88- save $12.45

Roast Beef Dices $26.36 - save $8.78

Carrot Dices $11.54 - save $3.89

Other Items:

Peppers, mixed bell... $8.63 - save $3.96

6 Grain Pancacke Mix $7.56 - save $2.57

Let me know if you want any of these sale items!

Shelf Reliance

2010-03-19T11:17:00.000-07:00

It's the HOT,NEWcraze...in Utah! What you ask, hosting a food storage party. Not only am I having a party, but I am becoming a consultant, with my girlfreind Celeste for Shelf Reliance.
WE ARE SO EXCITED!

Shelf Reliance not only sells shelving units, but the Thrive food line. And the best part...when you attend the parties, you get a "party price." A normal 72" Harvest shelving unit sells for ~~$459.99~~ reg. At a party, you pay ONLY $298.99! Thats a SAVINGS of $161.00!!! The Thrive product is also cheaper at the parties. We tried the fantastic freeze dried pineapple chunks - so yummy! Reg ~~$36.12~~ - party price $26.37

If you have not had the opportunity to attend one of these parties yet, it doesn't surprise me. It is so new, they only have over 100 consultants. We are so excited to grab on, and show you what we have to offer.

We attended a party last night, and left so excited for my food storage. I set up a "Q." This allows me to get my family food storage for all 5 of us, within our budget. I set up a monthly amount I can afford, and it ships part of my Q to me each month. My Q is for 3 months food storage, my budget is $75 per month, and I will get shipments for 28 months. You can personalize it however you would like, for as much as you would like.

Are you ready to get as excited as us?

OUR FIRST PARTY.....

When: Friday April 2, 2010

Where: Margaret's

7771 South 400 West, Paradise

Time: 7:00-9:00

RSVP: 881-8035

Please come and please bring yourself, friends, neighbors, relatives, co-workers.

WE WANT TO SEE ALL OF YOU!

We will have lots of great product to sample, and some great food storage info.

Check it out; http://www.shelfreliance.com/

pay it forward

2010-03-05T15:52:00.000-08:00

In the month of January I wrote a post about my mother - and how I felt about death. Just last week I wrote another post about this sweet little angel here at the apartment community that I manage. Most of those responses were something to the extent of me being a great friend and person....and I feel the need to clarify.
I was not looking for a pat on the back, I just wanted write my feelings out. I had so many thoughts and emotions. I was so thankful that I could be there for Jennifer that day - and that I could "pay it forward."
The day my mother passed, she was here with me at work. It all happened so quickly. I had to rely on friends to find and take care of my children until I could get home. I was not in the frame of mind to be worried about those things.
I, personally, was grateful that I could help someone else in such a stressful time. I felt joy and comfort knowing that I was doing for someone that had once been done for me.
Today I attended the funeral. If funerals could be called uplifting - this was one! WOW! Both mom and dad were the speakers, and they did an AMAZING job. They are spiritually in such a wonderful place. I do not doubt that days and nights will be hard, more tears will be shed, and days will sometimes be filled with anger. These are natural emotions. (I still yell at the heavens)
When my mother passed I learned some very VALUABLE lessons in life. EVERYONE NEEDS SOMEONE! So many came to my rescue. I never knew until then how even a simple card would mean so much.
Pay it forward! When you have a thought to call someone, drop a little note, or visit them - DO IT! They may need it more than you can imagine.

One Life

2010-02-26T10:13:00.000-08:00

The day was not what I had expected. I put a line of facebook about eating snickers, and needing to put it down. I was working on a resident file. And then, the sirens.

Three police cars sped past my office, followed quickly by the ambulance. I grabbed my keys and ran out the door. The fire truck was rounding the bend. I noticed they stopped in front of a specific apartment. My heart dropped, and ran faster. I entered the apartment, she collapsed in my arms. “She quit breathing, Margaret.” The paramedics took this sweet little angel out the door. The mother cried and little sister ran naked in the house. “I don’t have a car, my husband is at school.” I dressed baby girl, and told mom I would be right back and I would get her to the hospital.

Traffic has never been so slow. We hit every stop light. Mom cried, and rambled through her thought of what had just happened in the last 24 hours. She had just talked to Dad 20 min ago, and told him something was wrong. She told him she would call if anything changed…

We waited in the “rose room” at the hospital for Dad. Mom was told to wait for Dad to go back into the room – still no news. Dad walked in, mom fell into his arms, crying. He holds her close and tells her that she has done everything right.

Baby girl and I go for a walk, I’m sure Mom and Dad needed to visit and hold each other alone. I then see the doctor go into the room. The emotion on his face is sad and lost. It only takes a few minutes, and then Mom, Dad, Social Worker and Doctor exit the room.

Dad is pale, slumped over, with hollow eyes. His hand is in moms back, guiding her forward. She is crying. Her eyes are red from crying. She is holding onto Dad as if her legs may give out at any time. They are guided into the ER. The Social Worker comes back to inform the Bishop and myself that our sweet little Gwen has passed away.

I instantly well up with tears, finding it hard to hold back. I squeeze baby sister, and kiss her head. She looks up at me with concern.

I spent the next few hours walking with baby sister around the hospital. My cell phone would not work, so had more than enough time to ponder and think about the event of the day. This sweet little sister having no idea what has just taken place, how her family’s lives would be changed forever.

I was asked to take baby sis back to say good bye. I entered the room, the same room I said goodbye to my own mother in. The feelings rushed back through every inch of my body. I tried to keep myself cool and collected for the family’s sake. Baby sis kissed big sis on the head, and said goodbye. She then looked at me and said, “walk?” We left the room, walked some more.

As I left the hospital last night, I wasn’t sure how to express my own feelings. My heart was heavy for this sweet family. Instantly I was so thankful that they were good members of the church, that the Bishop was there to help and guide them. I knew in my soul that they would be okay.

Mom is expecting another baby – maybe that was all a part of the plan. They will be blessed with a perfect little angel soon.

Sweet little Gwen struggled in this life. She was born deaf and blind, with numerous other genetical problems. Her parents were amazing and the love that they had for her shown through every movement they made with her. I often saw them taking the girls for walks along the River trail. They would stop in my office and get suckers and visit.

I feel so blessed to have known this sweet little angel.

Good bye sweet girl.

luv'n the small things

2010-02-19T08:40:00.000-08:00

"Scentportables"
Have you seen these fun new things? They are for your car, closet, pantry, garbage can, ect...

I stopped in at Bath and Body last week and saw these cute little things, and since they were on sale, I GOT 2. I have one in my car, and the other in Joslynns closet (her feet stink).

They are so dang cute, and you can purchase the little refillables.

just something small to make me smile.

Have a great weekend!

grab a tissue

2010-02-11T11:12:00.000-08:00

Through one of my freinds blog, I found this story. Touching and heartwrenching, but lovely. I hope you enjoy the little things in life today.

http://enjoyingthesmallthings.blogspot.com/2010/01/nella-cordelia-birth-story.html

a little help here, please!

2010-02-02T09:36:00.000-08:00

Okay all you bloggers. and blog stalkers...I NEED SOME HELP! Jayson and I will be celebrating our 10yr. anniversary this March. Every year were going to do something "great" and never get to it. We end up going to dinner here in little Cache Valley, and going home to the kids.
We have been throwing some ideas around like...
1. Oregon Coast road trip
2. Cruise...is a 3 day cruise worth it?
3. Vegas (we LOVE vegas)
4. Jackson Hole...but it's the Hillclimbs

Were open to just about anything. Were both willing to take a few days off work, so something around 4-5 day trip total. And of course, we just built a house, so nothing to extremely expensive. Road trips can be so fun - if you know where you are going, or what you'd like to see.
Tell me places you've been, things you've seen, or places you would love to go!

PS - my next post will be...WHO WANTS TO BABYSIT MY KIDS, while were gone? :)

ONLY ONE

2010-01-25T14:32:00.000-08:00

SUPER BOWL XLIV...

2 teams,
ONLY ONE champ!

New Orleans Saints

Indianapolis Colts

ohhhhh Peyton....

(My Dad's a Colts fan, so I'll be cheering for them.)

Slumber Party

2010-01-21T09:51:00.000-08:00

Oh how I love a good slumber party, but I am a little too old for that now. Now I have the adult versions of a Slumber Party.
As most of you are aware, I like to host parties...:) One of my favorite is Slumber Parties. If any of you have a healthy sexual relationship with your partner, you most likely know what this is. If you have ever been to one of these parties, you also know that it is NOT just about bedroom toys. If you have NEVER been to one of these parties...YOU NEED TO! These girls are trained to be "relationship counselors." Everything from a keychain to power tools. I have been to some that were not so tasteful, and some that felt as if I just attended marriage and sexual therapy.
For those of you who are interested,

WERE HAVING A PARTY!

Where : Riverwalk Apartments Clubhouse - 781 S Riverwalk Dr. (Golf Course Road)

When : Saturday, February 23

Time : 6:00

*Just in time for Valentines*

Jaime will have a huge inventory, so be prepared to take home your purchases.

The Plan

2010-01-19T09:07:00.000-08:00

It's funny the things we choose to remember in life. The events, the exact thought or moments. January 19 will ALWAYS be a day of remembrance. January 19, 2007 I lost my mother, my best friend. She wasn't always my best friend...we had our days. If I could take back just one of those bad days today I would. I was a mean, stubborn, rude teenager who knew everything. No one could tell me what to do or how the choices I was making would affect me forever.

My mother was a saint. I am positive that she was one of the chosen few sent down to this earth on a mission. A mission of love, acceptance and happiness. She completed it and returned to our Heavenly home.

I tell myself daily that it is all a part of the plan. This was the plan. She completed her task here on earth, and returned home at her chosen time. It was not my choice when her mission was complete. I wish I could have picked that time, knew it was coming, and had some warning.

As most things in life, we have no warnings. Things happen and we have to be prepared. When we will lose something or someone is unknown. We need to be prepared - but how do you prepare for death?

The day my mother passed away is a day that runs through my head constantly. I can tell you specific things about the early hospital visit for her heart stress test, helping her into the car, calling my dad to say hi, the stop light we sat at, the conversation as we walked into The Old Grist Mill for lunch, the Diet Coke I bought at "the old" Maceys, the color of her shirt, shutting the door, Elizabeth yelling something was wrong, the sound of her last breath, administering CPR with my very dear friend Devin, the 3 EMT's, the sound of my father’s voice on the other end of the phone line, my little sister collapsing in my arms, calling my brother and sister, Jennifer and I embracing in the ER parking lot, Andrew holding up my father, touching her, leaving her, driving home alone, phone calls, feeling the love of others, feeling alone, telling my children, crying, understanding, explaining, sleepless nights on the couch at my dads, never wanting to go home, dressing my mother in her temple clothes, family, friends, crying, screaming into the heavens, wondering why today, why now?

Many of us have lost someone that we love very much - family, friend, a pet, a neighbor. Each person/thing can play an important role to us. How we take the events and learn from them is up to us. I take my mother’s death as an experience to learn from. I could have crumbled and died the day my mother left this earth, but I didn't. I have a family, children, a husband, and my dad. I chose to remember her - each moment that she gave me. Advice about marriage, kids, love, acceptance, the gospel, the plan.

Since my mother’s death I have become closer to those who have always been in my life. People that I took for granted, people I never spoke to, people I never appreciated and loved. I forgave those I thought had done me wrong, only to realize that It was my own stubbornness. I have a closer bond to my father than ever before.

I believe in the plan, I know the plan.

But, I still miss her!

I love you mom, until we meet again....

Attila the Hun

2010-01-13T09:15:00.000-08:00

If any of you would like some info on Attila the Hun, I am a PRO! Until last night I wasn't even sure who this was. Jayson had to tell me that he was a character in Night at the Museum...oh...THAT Attila the Hun...DUH! (the Chinese lookin dude, that's mean). Attila was the fierce 5th century leader of the barbarian group known as the Huns who struck fear in the hearts of the Romans as he plundered everything in his path, invaded the Eastern Empire and then crossed the Rhine into Gaul. He was the most feared King of the Huns. Some say that he was a God, others called him the Scourge of God. He died by drinking too much. Attila passed out flat on his back. It was then and there that Attila had a massive nosebleed which caused him to choke on his own blood, on his wedding night!
Joslynn is FAILING, yes BIG FAT F...in 4 CLASSES! How do you fail 4 of your 5 classes? It has been an ongoing struggle with us. In fact, Jayson and I fight over this problem most. Last Sunday was the big one. Yes people, I told him I was done! I had a BAD cold, I was tired, my body ached, Ashton and Addy just wanted to be loved, and we were fighting. Fighting about Joslynns grades. She didn't care...she was in her room. So why were we in such a big fight over her grades if she doesn't care?
I spent the night on the couch (I actually love sleeping on the couch), and didn't sleep AT ALL. Between the cold, and wanting to beat Jayson in his sleep, I just stayed up all night trying to figure this out in my head.
Monday was ROUGH, but thanks to my dear friend, she talked me through it. She made me realize that I need to let Jayson handle Joslynn. As much as I love her and do not want her to fail, Jayson needs to take care of it. I have to step back, and let Jos make her own choices.
*She is currently grounded from her IPod, cell phone, TV, Computer, "going out," home phone, and pretty much anything else you can think of, and she doesn't even care!*
I came home Monday, hashed it out with Jayson and then informed both Jayson and Joslynn that I loved them both very much, but mentally I can not be evil step-mom, or the only one who takes care of Joslynn anymore. I told both of them to talk between each other to figure out shit, that It was no longer my problem!
so....a week went buy, and I said nothing...one whole week! You have to realize what this means for me to shut up for a week! Yesterday was parent teacher conf. Ashton and Addy went to the sitter, and Joslynn GOT to come to work with me so she could sit in the back office ALL day and do supervised homework. On the way to work, I was compelled to stop in at MC for parent-teach conf (shocked the holy hell out of Jos). I AM SO GLAD WE WENT! Her teachers were nice enough to go to the classrooms and get all of her missing assignments. I wasn't upset, I didn't really even say anything. She got in the car and started to cry. She told me how sorry she was, and that she knew she could do better.
5 hours later, and a gazillion assignments later, we started to work on the report due..TODAY! Why would you NOT wait until the last minute to do a report that needs 6 sources? Hence, Attila the Hun.
At 1:30 am we finished...Jos and I...learning, writing, and discussing Attila the Hun. What did I get - a big HUG, and a "thanks for saving my butt!" I didn't even get mad last night. It was good. We connected. She asked. She was thankful. Jayson was thankful. I was tired. And today my friends, is a new day!
Maybe I'm a little "Attila." To some I am a God, to others they fear me. Oh, how I wish people thought I was a God.

Christmas Break

2010-01-07T10:44:00.000-08:00

New years day we all got together for a little snow play. Jayson, Judy, Margo and Jill built these snowmen, filled with "blood bags," and then enjoyed a fun game of shoot the snowmen.

YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF:You shoot guns off your back porch

YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF: You pull a truck hood behind a snowmobile as a sled. (it really does work)

Margaret and Jayson were built.

KarLee made sure Aunt Maggie had morning hair.

We spent the day after Christmas with my moms sisters at our annual Ice Skating Day.

My sweet 95 yr. old Great Aunt on the ice, In Ice Skates!

Proud CVE sponsors

My dads grandchildren
Tristin, KarLee, Addy Jos and Ashton

I just LOVE this picture!

Christmas Day Ashton, AKA Nitro Circus wanna be, got his first cast

A glimpse of 2009

2009-12-31T08:24:00.000-08:00

I am sorry...for another post with no pictures. I really hate looking at other blogs when all I have to do is read, so for this, please forgive me.

My mother passed January 19, 2007 - so ironically each year begins with me crying because I miss her so much. I think I have cried at least once a day for the past week. My mother was an amazing person who listened to EVERYTHING I had to say - bless her heart! ( I talk a LOT) It seems as I host parties throughout the holidays I miss her a little more. My mother loved a good party with lots of family and friends feasting over good food. I'll host another party tonight, and think of her. I love and miss her!

My sweet grandmother passed away this year. What an amazing woman she was. She lost her husband while very young, and continued to run the family farm. She never re-married. She raised six very honest and successful children on her own.

I was able to attend Wicked (thank you Sam) with Judy, Jill, Margo and Dave at the Capitol in SLC. What a FUN night!

My brother lost his sweet dog Susie. She was a "good dog." Lucky for him, some jerk dropped a puppy off by Hardware Ranch in November. Kirby is now officially part of the family.

WE BUILT A HOUSE...This is something that we were going to do after two years of marriage. We will be celebrating 10 years in 3 months. I'm just glad were in! I still have days when I walk to the top of the stairs and just stare. I can't believe we are finally in!

Jayson received his 10 year recognition with CVE. We were invited to attend a nice dinner and awards ceremony at the Grand America. I am so proud of him! I admire his dedication to his job, and his willingness to work wherever, whenever. He has spent many long hours on the road, providing for our family. CVE is a great company to work for, and I am blessed to know that Jayson enjoys what he does.

After a long and very heated phone call, I think that Christy (Jayson's x) and I might just be able to speak. This has been (and probably will be) a battle until Joslynn is an adult. However, there was this ONE phone call that put us on a level we have never been before. Cross your fingers. :)

Addy got her tonsils out. She has probably needed this done for years, but one last cold let us know that it was time. Her vocals have changed so much it's almost funny. She is such a good girl. She's getting a little bossy in her day - I don't know where she gets that from. :)

Ashton was doing some tricks off his bed, that resulted in a broken arm. He got his cast on Christmas Eve. He wanted it to be in Steelers color, however they did not have yellow - so this resulted in a red cast. He will get it off in 4 weeks

Jayson got to go to Denver to see the Steelers play the Broncos. Steelers won (one of the few wins this season.) We are hoping for a better ending to the season.

I spent a fun weekend in SLC with some girls celebrating our birthdays. Were planning on another trip this summer. We ate at the The Melting Pot - so much fun! The bill for the five of us was $300+ - :) I guess you've got to have those experiences once in a while! We had quite the adventure at Cameo College getting pedicures done.

The Gittins held the annual family reunion in Park City. It's a great chance to relax and have some fun. Lots of food, games, and late nights.

Each year that passes I am grateful to have what I have. I am thankful to live so close to family - both Jaysons and I. We are both blessed with wonderful parents and siblings. I am surrounded by a wonderful extended family also.
2009 has taught me a lot about myself. I lost a very dear friendship with one of my closest friends, and offended a handful of other friends. It's amazing that at my age and married with children, friends are still as important as they were in High School.
I am not much of a resolution maker....but I have one - BE A BETTER ME! Only I can make my life enjoyable, fun, exciting, adventurous and worthwhile. I want to enjoy my life while I have it. Enjoy today...yesterday was the past, tomorrow is the future, and today is the PRESENT!
Happy 2010!

It's a LOVE/ hate relationship

2009-12-21T16:07:00.000-08:00

To my love,

Why do you taunt me everyday (especially Mondays)? Do you understand that I want you out of my life? You are controlling this relationship and making me weak. Do you know that I must be in control at all times? I am stronger than you! You are affecting my personal standards, and I must once again ask you to leave my life! PLEASE Coke, understand that we can not be together anymore. All of that hard work to loose extra baggage...you are adding it back...slowly and steady like a slithery snake. I am a strong person, and I can not have you near me. You are my weakness. I crave you, I need you. You are my one true love. Why must you hurt me constantly? I need to be strong and leave you behind. Good bye sweet love, I must go now. Perhaps we will meet again.

All of my love, forever.

I want a new Mom

2009-12-15T15:31:00.000-08:00

I am very sure that every child tells their parent at some moment in their sweet little lives, that they wished they had a "new mom".
Last night we went to Sams and Best Buy to look at TVs for the basement. I wouldn't let Ashton look at toys until he ate his very healthy Sams Club Pizza Dinner. He wouldn't eat, so I made Jayson take the girls and leave us at the table until he ate.As we were sitting there, he smiles every so cutely at me and says every so calmly
ashton: "Mom, I wish I had a new mom."
me: "oh really, why?"
ashton: "well, a new mom would get me whatever I want. She wouldn't have a dad (husband)either, so I could sleep with her every night."
me: "would she love you?"
ashton: " yep, more than you mom."
me: "that's too bad, cause I love you a bushel and a peck."
ashton: (giggling) "okay mom, I'll just keep you."

I must suck

2009-12-07T16:01:00.000-08:00

What do I get a 15 yr. old girl??? How, as a parent, do I NOT know what to get my own child for Chritmas? She has asked for a CD.....a CD people!! Well, hmm...$15 later, I'm done! She just got a whole new room, with a new bed and a matress. Can you tell a kid, oh, that's Christmas? Damn, this sucks...I suck!
I am not a believer of gift cards. I think they scream, I have no idea what you want or what you like, so heres some money, go buy it yourself. I did get her some jeans, but she was with me. Ashton got her a hoodie, and Addy got her a hat and some jewlery (I hope she doesn't read my blog). I need that gift that just puts a HUGE smile on her face! The present that she thinks, "how did they know this is what I wanted?"
HELP PEOPLE.... I NEED SOME IDEAS!
Thankfully,
Sucky Mom

Traditions

2009-11-27T22:38:00.000-08:00

DO you know what the best thing about the holidays are??? By the title of my post I bet you can't guess. TRADITIONS! Didn't see that coming, did ya?
The other day my Dad stopped by my office, and we started in on how my mother was the QUEEN of traditions. If we didn't have one, by damn, we would use someone elses. She was always trying to start up a new tradition. Now that I'm older, I wish I would have appreciated her ambition more to create great memories. I'm working on that now.
Some of my favorite... What a better way to start the New Year off with than family and Chinese Sundays? These suckers are my favorite! Some call them Hawaiian Haystacks. Aunt Nan named them otherwise, and I like the name better. Somewhere in time we started eating these on New Years day with my dads family. Jayson has learned to "like" these, otherwise he would not be welcome in the family.
Purchasing a "real" Christmas tree on December 5th. Jennifers birthday was the 5th, so it somehow became the day we would buy a tree. I love a real tree! Jayson and I go to the Merrill Family Tree Farm on the 5th, and buy our family tree. One of our first Christmases together we got us a good 'ol charlie brown tree, just because we could. That poor thing was about to fall over by the time we decorated it.
Each year we purchase a new Hallmark Ornament for each of us. The kids have really started to enjoy this, and like to help pick out the ornament they would like. The first ornament I bought Jos was a little angel. She says that one is still her favorite.
Easter is spent at the Westons for Judys annual Easter Egg Hunt. She usually hides 300+ eggs for all of us to find. Some eggs have money, car wash tokens, or just good old fashioned candy. The bad thing about this holiday...somehow Ashton always ends up wet in the pond. I guess you could call this a tradition too.
Jayson cooks up a mean corned beef and cabbage dinner for St. Patty's. Last year we added "Colcanon Potatoes" to the mix, and that my friends will be a new addition to this holiday! Those babies were the BEST!
Firework Chasing is what I do best, and each year Jayson reminds me how much he loves me for that. I do WHATEVER I can to make sure that we see EVERY show in the valley during the summer. Health Days in Smithfield has the first show of the season.
Pioneer Day is spent in North Logan, and the world best parade. The parade starts on the corner of my grandparents lawn. Gran always decorated a float for the grand kids, so that we could ride in the parade. Now, my sweet aunties do it for the great-grandchildren. We then enjoy a great lunch with the cousins and aunties in Aunt Maries back yard.
"Sometime" during the week between Christmas and New Years the Beutler family gathers for a great day on the Ice. I grew up going to the outdoor rink in Logan. Now we enjoy the comfort of the Eccles Ice Center.
Jayson grilling...this in itself is a family tradition. Jayson is GREAT on the grill, and cooks up a mean Pork Tenderloin that is requested a most major family functions.
I have hosted Thanksgiving twice now, and am anticipating 2011! Thanks to great family, yesterday was such a wonderful day. My kitchen was full of great cooks, and the home was filled with love and laughter. I might add that the Turkey this year was EXCEPTIONAL! Whatever I did...I'm writing it down and repeating it next time.
Memorial Weekend is spent at Camp Cushman, usually in the rain, with great friends and a lot of beer for the men. Kids are usually covered in mud, and have smiles you can't wipe off. A lot of great food is cooked, and late nights around the campfire.
My NEW tradition is the pre-food party held Thanksgiving Eve. We gathered some friends this year, and had a lot of great appetizers. We were "belly stretching."
Most of all, I love tradition for the simple fact that traditions are made of great memories with those you love. I am so thankful to have so many people in my life that I have so many great memories with.
to all my traditions, and more to come...
What's your favorite tradition?

Oh my goodness...YUMMY chicken!

2009-11-20T20:00:00.000-08:00

Nothing better than throwing something in the crock pot, and coming home after a long day to dinner ready. My girlfriend Celeste brought this idea to me last weekend, and I twisted it just a little. Here's both...

4-5 Large un-cooked Chicken Breasts
1 Cube Butter
1 pkg. dry Italian Spice mix
( I had about 1/2 C dressing in the fridge, and used that too)

Crock pot on low heat for 6 hours, shred
Add:

Celeste's version:
1 8oz. pkg. cream cheese
1 can cream of chicken
Serve over rice or noodles

Margaret's version:
1 can cream of chicken
1 can Ro-Tel
1/2 C sour cream
serve in hot tortillas
(or make a huge plate of Nachos!)

The Italian dressing, and butter do something to this chicken that makes you want to eat it by the spoonful. Either way ----this was SO YUM!

Pumpkin Dessert

2009-11-20T19:57:00.000-08:00

With all the fall ideas out there, I thought I would throw you another one. Jayson is NOT a fan of Pumpkin, and actually likes this one. It's a different twist on Pumpkin Pie. If any of you have heard of this recipe, it is usually made with a vanilla cake mix, and no nuts or oatmeal. I love the addition of spice cake...and anything is better with nuts! :)

PUMPKIN DESSERT:
Crust:
1 pkg spice cake mix
1/2 C. melted butter
1 egg
1/2 quick oats
1/2 C chopped nuts
Combine in bowl, Reserve 2/3 C for crumble topping. Press into greased 9x13 pan.

Filling: Pour over pressed crust
1 Lg. can Libbys Pumpkin Pie Mix (26 oz)
1 Can Evaporated Milk
2 eggs - slightly beaten
1 Tbls. Pumpkin Spice Mix

Topping: Sprinkle over pumpkin topping
2/3 C reserved crumble
1/2 C Sugar
3 tsp. cinnamon
1/4 C quick oats
1/4 C Chopped nuts

Bake at 350 for 45 min. Let cool for one hour. Serve or refrigerate for later

Happy Thanksgiving! Enjoy!

Pioneer Woman, take 1

2009-11-13T09:25:00.000-08:00

I went home so excited to cook out of this new cookbook, so I found a reason to cook last night. A cute gal in my ward was in desperate need for a treat :), and she would be my excuse to make this wonderful thing!
My grammy made something similar called Texas sheet cake, but I haven't gotten out the rec. to see just how similar they are.
This only took about 30 min to prepare, and was super yum! Instead of using a jelly roll pan, I divided it into two 9X13, and sent the other one wtih Jayson to work. Enjoy!

Pioneer Woman Chocolate Sheet Cake
Combine in a mixing bowl:
2 cups flour
2 cups sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
In a saucepan, melt:
2 sticks butter
Add 4 heaping tablespoons cocoa.
Stir together. Add 1 cup boiling water, allow mixture to boil for 30 seconds, then turn off heat. Pour over flour mixture, and stir lightly to cool.

In measuring cup,
pour 1/2 cup buttermilk.
Add:2 beaten eggs
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon vanilla
Stir buttermilk mixture into butter/chocolate mixture.

Pour into sheet cake pan and bake at 350-degrees for 20 minutes.

While cake is baking, make icing:
Chop 1/2 cup pecans finely.
Melt 1 3/4 sticks butter in a saucepan.
Add 4 heaping tablespoons cocoa, stir to combine, then turn off heat.
Add:6 tablespoons milk
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 lb minus 1/2 cup powdered sugar
Stir together. Add pecans, stir together, and pour over warm cake.

Cut into squares, eat, and totally wig out over the fact that you’ve just made the best chocolate sheet cake. Ever.

Pioneer Woman

2009-11-12T09:38:00.000-08:00

I am so excited! I pre-ordered this cookbook 3 months ago....and it's here! Remember how I thought I felt a fall cooking day coming on...well, this just puts the cherry on the cream. Saturday will be a great day.

hot to cook!

2009-11-11T13:44:00.000-08:00

As I am sure you are all aware, we moved into our new home last Friday. This past week has been so much fun, learning where I put everything. My kids are loving having that ENTIRE basement to themselves, and I am enjoying a bathroom that is my very own...with the fact that I do have to share with a boy!
I promise...I will post this weekend with pics of the house. I really wanted to get it all decorated before I did that however. I went from 2 very small houses, to this one that feels like a mansion. All of my home decor goes on "smaller" walls, so It's a little bit of a challenge. I'm working on it though...and will keep you all updated!
As for the kitchen...ah...true love! Double Ovens, Butcher Block, and Gas Stove Top...HEAVEN! As for the dishwasher, well...not love! I know, how? what? why? Well, I have been hand washing dishes in scalding hot water for my ENTIRE married life...all 10 years! Plus, years before that because my mother had severe arthritis, and her dishwasher didn't work. I have found myself the past few evenings washing dishes by hand. It does something to my soul. Calms me, relaxes me, puts me a peace. Plus, I KNOW how clean they are. I have found myself only putting utensils, cups, and bowls in the dishwasher. This might take some getting used to!
Now, for the butcher block, I could kiss this baby! I think I should name her since we are becoming such close friends. Together, in one week, we have made cinnamon rolls, orange rolls, 30 min rolls, and pumpkin pie (from REAL pumpkins). This weekend I feel doughnuts coming on...that's right...OPEN INVITATION TO COME GET SOME HOT SPUDNUTS SATURDAY MORNING! I'm not sure what else I will work up, but I feel a fall baking day coming on!

I-Fly'd

2009-11-09T08:22:00.001-08:00

Ashton has been wanting to "fly" FOREVER! On Saturday we went down to Soloman Center in Ogden to i-Fly. Joslynn, Ashton, Celeste, Brady and I all flew! It was so much fun. I was so nervous, but I figured if my little man could do it, so could I. Ashton was AWESOME! He held his body the "right" way, and got the full flight advantage. His instructor was so great with him. We all had so much fun and can't wait to go back!

Little Man

2009-11-05T15:31:00.000-08:00

I can not stand that this little guy is now 5! He is growing up way to fast.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMAS MAN!

thankful

2009-10-30T09:09:00.000-07:00

I know, It's Halloween not Thanksgiving. However, I feel an overwhelming sense of thanks today and wanted to share.
(just some things) I AM THANKFUL FOR....
*1 acre corner lot, with the best view *Wonderful in-laws who have let us live with them for the last week *A reliable car (even with a flat tire last night) to drive all over this beautiful valley in *A husband who greets me at the door when I am at the end of my rope to tell me he loves me *Parents who taught me that with faith and understanding, all things are possible *A father who can fix my flat tire *Three amazing children *Great friends who come to my rescue day after day *A great job *A contractor who understands my obsession with Clorox and perfection *My dog Zoey who loves me and snuggles me no matter what *Coke and Alieve *My sis who sends me the cutest pics of my niece and nephew (cause they love Aunt Maggie mostest) *My brother who checks in on me, and fills me in on the latest *"mammas man" *running water *warm bread *funny texts *comments on my blog :) *a new home *old friends....and new friends *Logan City for giving me a trash can to haul all my shit away in *My aunties who call me all the time *The Pumpkin Walk, and the thought of tradition *family *my funny sis who JUST sent me a pic of her in a green M&M costume (she keeps it real) *Joslynns little notes she leaves me when I've had a bad day *second mothers *the gospel *my mom!! (miss you) *life's lessons *grandparents *Clorox *Addys pictures on my fridge *pictures *memories *Sunday dinner *anything with carbs * holidays *gatherings *neighbors *treats *beauticians *the smell of new carpet *teachers *books *toothpaste *my fathers advice *kool-aid and popcorn *my testimony *shoes *baby lotion *the smell of fresh cut hay *my husband *epidurals *America *freedom *a bed to sleep in *warmth *siblings *forgiveness *gratitude *love

Moving and so on....

2009-10-27T08:49:00.001-07:00

I have to admit, I am ADDICTED to my blog, your blog, and everyone else's blog, and a little facebook on the side. Needless to say, I feel that I have this constant connection to everyone in the world. They can enjoy, laugh and cry with me all at the same time - and I don't even know about it, until they publish a comment or story about it.
Last week I posted a little note on facebook, something like - Please don't ask when we are moving in. Why? I am on the verge of a breakdown! So I will share with you a little story. Grab your blanky, find a warm spot, get settled in. Are you ready?
The rental story: In August of 2006, we put our house up for sale. It sold 2 months later. We were lucky enough to rent a home 3 HOUSES SOUTH, yes, 3 houses. New neighborhood, new ward, new neighbors. We told the landlord that we would be renting for a year, MAX! - - Oh, right - 3 YEARS LATER,we finally moved out!
I am a landlord as a profession, so I can only imagine how Ms. Curtis felt. She had talked of selling the house, renting it to family, or just renting it again. When we finally started building we thought we would be out Sept.1, but that didn't happen either. She was being so patient with me, but I could feel the un-welcome bug creeping in.
We have been trying to move every week since September, but it hasn't been happening. Thankfully we built Jayson a huge storage unit...oh, I mean shop (hahahaha), and have been taking loads of stuff down every weekend.
THE HOLD UP - We (Todd and I) decided to do concrete counter tops for the entire house. Todd had never done these before, but was really excited to try. 1st problem - waiting for the check from the bank, 2nd problem - has to order more red dye, 3rd problem - It is a four step process, with each step needing 24 hours in between, 4th problem - needed to order MORE RED dye. We FINALLY got everything...and then it's just a PROCESS! I AM SO HAPPY with the counters. The plumber couldn't come until counters were set, and you can't get a final clearance until EVERYTHING is done.
We decided to go ahead and move the past weekend and then stay with Jaysons parents. We hoped that we would have clearance on Monday. We spent all day Saturday moving, thanks to some VERY great friends with trucks and trailers. Sunday I spent the day at the rental CRYING and cleaning. It took ALL day, and as a landlord, I hope Ms. Curtis is thankful for my cleaning skills.

The "redneck" way of moving a trampoline

What I start to look like after 3 days of no sleep!

Lunch break, have to feed the help!

MONDAYS small DISASTER-
Jayson and I both took off work yesterday to final up some things on the house, while the "workers" were sanding down the counter tops. I was arranging the house and was planning on going into work about noon. Well, at about 11:30 we had a little disaster. Something happened with the well when they were turning it on, and it blew water OUT of the utility room onto yes, my new carpet! THANKFULLY, my good friend and neighbor is Wade Rasmussen AKA Absolutely Clean Carpets. ( He is great, and always willing to help out my friends. You can call him at 512-1402!) He was on the way to clean the rental, and I asked him to stop at the new house to exact the water. He said everything looked fine, but...well..arghhHH! We turned up the heat, and put fans near the wet spots. I think it is all taken care of. I must have been pretty tired, because It didn't seem to really matter. Quick fix, all better!

Now a little note about the house - I am SO excited for a NEW home, I just DON'T want to move. I love my Dad very much, and want my kids to be able to run and play at the farm, and have a HUGE farm as a backyard playground. HOWEVER - the Woolfs are the most amazing people in the world!

Steve and JennaVee are the WORLDS BEST NEIGHBORS!!! We LOVE them. Jayson started calling me Margaret Woolf at some point over the past three years. They take care of us, invite us over, bring in the trash can, feed us, love us, and accept us. We have had many great memories that involve the Woolfs and their entire family over the past few years. Sunday Carmel popcorn is one of my favorites :) We love everyone of them.

Saturday when we were getting the "last" load out JennaVee and Anna came over. I started to cry, and the minute they were out of sight, I started to BAWL! I was crying so hard I couldn't breath. I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE MY CORNER! Jayson just held my hand and didn't say a word. It was at this moment that I realized the reason I have been so blah about my new house is because I would rather have my old house with great neighbors. Katie and Rex (the neighbors dogs) were even making me cry.

I will miss this old house, and everything about it. The leak in Ashtons ceiling, hot water faucet in the main bath that doesn't work, creaky floor, sump pump in the laundry, small kitchen, fireplace in the living room, doors that won't lock (yes, you could have been robbing us for years), old barns for the kids to play in, WONDERFUL neighbors - Woolfs, Atwoods, Russells, and the Weeks, ALL the dogs in Paradise coming over for Sunday treats, selling Saturday doughnuts on the corner, the park 1 block away, the bay window that my kids think is where coats and backpacks go, the old wood burning stove pipe that the birds like to come through,the COKE machine 1 block away, the fire pit, the porch that will one day collapse, the dogs that shit on my lawn, the cows that shit on my lawn, the basement that leaks when the pasture renters don't turn off the sprinklers, the fire department in all it's glory 1 block away, fresh produce on my doorstep, not having a garage, all the HUGE rock for Ashton to find bugs under, the great hill to ride your bike off, City utilities, Ms. Curtis, my OWN closet, "the hidden closet," where ALL my crap goes, neighbor kids thinking I make the BEST treats around, walking late at nigh with street lights, talking in the middle of the road, and a GREAT family ward!
For those of you who don't know where I live, or where I am moving - here's the details. We live on 9100 S, and are moving to 7800 S - Yes 13 "blocks, " 2 MILES North. You would think that we are moving to the other end of the world. But, not being able to yell across the street, do morris code with lights in the kitchen window, send the kids over for whatever ingredient I am missing, have fresh Steve garden produce, or simply enjoy our visits in the middle of the road is the hardest thing for me to emotionally deal with. I KNOW that I can visit them anytime - but for now, no one will understand how this is tearing me apart. I can't thank the Woolf family enough for who they have been to me or my family over the past three years. It is a relationship that I will treasure throughout my life. Kaden and Bridger are my "other" kids, and I love them so much. They might just have to have sleepovers at my house. Jayson said I have to give up one of my night visits with my Dad to have one with the Woolfs :) We will miss you, but never forget! Thank you for a wonderful 3 years! (yes, crying hysterically again)

This is the view I love from my porch, the Woolfs back door- ALWAYS open and inviting!

As for the new house... today Tuesday October 27... 1. carpet man finishing grout in bathroom and pantry and putting down transition pieces. 2. Cutting seems in driveway concrete to prevent cracking. 3. Finishing up counter tops. 4. Plumber finishing up 5. "touch up" 6. Final Inspection today at 4:00....with high hopes and dreams! :)

fall festivities

2009-10-07T13:28:00.000-07:00

I love fall! It is my most favorite time of the year. I get so excited at all the fun things that I can do with my kids. The Pumpkin Walk is right around the corner, Fall Festival at Hardware Ranch, Halloween parties, Halloweenie Roast (my kids FAVORITE) and so many others! We kicked this season off with a new one - Gardners Village.

what a beautiful, fun day.

This was our "serious" pose with Helga Hyperspeed

Monica, me, Addy, Helga, Maddy, Jos and Presley.

Ashton was off looking at the cockroach graveyard.

Spiderman - all he wanted all day was his face pinted!

Addys "real" smile

We had a fantastic day - letting all the house worries wait for another day :)

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

put my &*#^% pants on!

2009-09-29T10:56:00.000-07:00

I swear the cabinets have been a true test of my faith. I took about 6 different bids to make sure I was getting what I wanted in my Kitchen. We finally decided that _________ would be the best one to go with. My only problem (before Friday) was this guy says "ya know what I mean" after EVERYTHING! Gets kinda annoying, but I could deal. THEN, on Thursday while I am in Heber, stressing about the house, I call him to make sure we are good for delivery on Friday - and the story begins.

THURSDAY:
man: Oh, I'm sorry Margaret, the paint needs to dry a little more before we put the knobs on, "ya know what I mean"
me: you mean the second coat? (my kitchen cabinets are white)
man: yes. I want them to be perfectly dry, "ya know what I mean"
me: we'll, I'm not very happy, but I can understand
man: we will try to have them out Friday night. If not - First thing Monday morning, "ya know what I mean"

FRIDAY:
me: Hello man, are we going to be able to get cabinets delivered today
man: uh, I don't think so, that paint is hard to dry "ya know what I mean"
me: so first thing Monday?
man: yes, we get them loaded tonight and have them ready for Monday, "ya know what I mean"
me: we'll, I'm not very happy, but I can understand

MONDAY:
1st phone call-
me: good morning - what time should I expect you today?
man: we need to let that paint dry, "ya know what I mean"
me: I thought that was Friday?
man: well, that was the first coat, "ya know what I mean"
me: (BIG SIGH) so, what are you thinking your timeline is then?
man: first thing tomorrow!

2nd phone call-
me: What time tomorrow?
man: can you unlock the house at 6am?
me: that will be fine

3rd phone call-
me: I just can to CONFIRM that we will have cabinets tomorrow. We are supposed to be moving in this weekend, and I can't have counter TOPS, until I have COUNTERS!
man: were just putting on the knobs, and then we will load them up for tomorrow....."ya know what I mean"
me: Is this a guarantee? I need to make a time with counter top man
man: yes, Margaret.
(do we think the man is getting annoyed?)

TUESDAY:
6am - Unlocked house
8am - NO CABINET MAN YET!
8:10 - phone call to cabinet man
me: Good morning - I hate to be that pain in the ass customer, but you are staring to be the pain in the ass cabinet man! Where are my cabinets, and why did I unlock the house at 6am if you aren't there yet?
man: We had to load them this morning, "ya know what I mean"
me: you mean the loading that was being done at 3pm yesterday when I was talking to you? You do understand that counter tops take 1 week, and I don't have a week? I would very much so appreciate your honesty, not smoke up my ass!
man: (getting grumpy) I am sorry, and they should be at your house any minute
me: Well, I sure hope so... It is Tuesday, "YA KNOW WHAT I MEAN!!"

so...at 8:30 on my way to work I stopped at the house...and....cabinets are in my house. Not installed, but at my house - with two very "cheerful" installers starting to install cabinets!

pictures to follow... :)

Still 29...

2009-09-21T22:53:00.000-07:00

My mothers birthday would have been this Wednesday, and since I will be at a Managers Retreat...and it's on my mind, I will write my thoughts now.
My Great Aunt passed away Sept 23, 2008. She had been sick, and in the hospital for a few days. I've always thought that my mother came to escort her to the other side, because she wanted one of her favorite people to share her birthday with her. Mom always loved a good party, with lots of yummy food!
I've been thinking so much of my mother these past few days, and have been on a pretty emotional roller coaster. Tonight when I got home, the kids asked what was for dinner - I was so happy to make Tomato Soup and Noodles - yep, that's it...elbow noodles and tomato soup. Mom used to make it all the time - so simple, yet the best thing on a cool fall evening.
We sat at the table and remembered wonderful things about my mom. Jos talked of how my mom could make friends with ANYONE, even in the grocery store line. She always had a positive attitude, and would drop anything to help you. Addy gets a little more emotional when she talks about her Mauree. I watched the tears well up as she remembered my mom making special treats for her, tea parties, walks to play with the kittens or feed the cows. Mom and Addy were the best of friends.
So many thoughts fill my soul as I think of the time I had with my mom. Jayson and I lived with my parents for 2 years - 2 glorious years that I am so thankful to have had. I loved taking my mom on rides to town, making something tasty, driving to 1888 to check on Gran and Grandad, watching a good Doris Day movie, or watching her love my Addy as if no one else in the world could be any more perfect than her.
It's been almost three years since I lost my mom, and some days the tears wont stop. Oh how I wish I could just call her up, and tell her about Ashtons new Halloween costume he's been running around in for the past two days, or how Addy gets 100% on her spelling and Math every day, or how Jos is a TEENAGER, and I am so sorry for rolling my eyes! I wish she could see my new house, and my wonderful kitchen, because that is in fact the MOST important room in any good wife's home (thanks mom).
Birthdays are for celebrating, so I will hold back my sobbing emotions. Life is so wonderful, and I was taught to live it to the fullest!
I miss you mom! Happy Birthday.

Happy Birthday Baby!

2009-09-18T23:11:00.000-07:00

September 18, 2000 I was blessed with my first born. Addy Lee Gittins was born at 10:38am, weighing 7lb. 6 oz. My beautiful little pea had NO hair - and was perfect in every way. Addy is the light of my day, keeping me on my toes. My family keeps telling her she is a tiny little mini me! :), poor girl!

Love you Boo - Happy Birthday!

Just a little reminder...

2009-09-16T20:34:00.000-07:00

Were having a Party...
Saturday,

yes THIS SATURDAY
at the Paradise Town Hall
10:00-1:00
*Shoes
*Purses
*True Religion Jeans
*Scentsy
Please come...

bring a friend, gab, and enjoy a treat!

It's really going to happen!

2009-09-10T14:22:00.001-07:00

We are 20 days from moving into our new home! YEA! I took my lunch today with Todd, our contractor, to finalize up some things. Jayson is finishing the back porch tonight, tomorrow is trim and closets. Monday will finish up closets and start priming and paint. Wednesday, Thursday and Friday I have taken vacation to do all the "accent" painting! Mike will be installing carpet, wood, and tile the week of the 21st, and cabinets should go in that week too---oh my heck, it's going to happen so fast, and then
WE WILL HAVE OUR NEW HOUSE!
I can't thank those who have been helping Jayson on the side enough. Tony Sharp and Dusty Gillman have put so much time into our electrical. Sammy has been so much help with the concrete, Brenton, Brett, Jason, Red, Jody, Pisser, Jake,and Jeremy. This list goes on, and I feel very fortunate to have such great friends! Thank you to all!
Jayson has put so much time into this house, and all his extra side work has made it possible for me to have my amazing kitchen, thanks babe! I LOVE YOU! Todd was great to work on sweat equity with us, not all contractors HONESTLY are, so thank you Todd.

This house building has been a great experience, and I can't wait to show you all the finished project!

I want to be like Julia

2009-09-06T21:19:00.000-07:00

So for a great sabbath evening, we took the kids to the movie. I know, not a Sunday activity. I went to church, made a wonderful home cooked meal, and wanted to see Julia and Julie.... Okay, no excuses...I just do whatever I want no matter what day of the week it is!

Jayson has been wanting to see GI Joe, and the ONLY reason I want to see this movie is so that I can drool over Channing Tatum, YUM! BUT, Julia and Julie was playing at the same time. Problem solved - boys to GI Joe, girls to Julia and Julie.
I have been inspired! Did I mention that I CAN NOT WAIT FOR MY NEW HOUSE WITH MY WONDERFUL KITCHEN, Butcher Block, Double Oven, DISHWASHER, counter space, HUGE pantry and my cookbooks at my fingertips? More excited that I can even begin to utter out of my mouth! My kitchen is my love. I have put more thought into that kitchen than an other thing in or on the house.
Back to Julia and Julie...This movie could be about me...well not really, but I would love to do it! She cooks the entire Julia Child cookbook in 365 days. How great would this be? This might just make the diet a complete loss, but It would be so worth it.
When my mom passed away Jennifer wanted the China, and I wanted the cookbooks. I remember my mom cooking from the Joy of Cooking, and I think I might just need to crack that sucker open. However - I feel the urge to go to Borders tomorrow, and grab some new books. I love going to Borders for cookbooks. They are always on SALE, or better yet, on CLEARANCE. I once bought 5 cookbooks for $10. Even if I only love a few ideas per book - it's still great! It's fun to have a freash idea and an option.
I wanted to come home and COOK, but it's a little late...and I AM OUT OF EGGS! Who runs out of eggs? Oh yes, that would be me after cooking Banana Bread, Banana Bars (I had lots of bad Bananas) and the most wonderful meatballs, I have gone through...36...yes...36 eggs in two days! And the worst part...I couldn't eat any of it! (diets SUCK!) I tried a new recipe for the bread and the bars. The meatballs - they are heavenly - and I don't do meatballs! Jaysons mom gave me that one, and he said I make them better than his momma...sad I know. No, not that she gave me a great recipe, or that I have perfected them, but that Jayson still calls her MAMMA. I tease him ALL the time. His mom is a wonderful cook, and I am lucky to have such a wonderful mother-in-law.
What to cook...oh, only dreams will tell. I'll post about it tomorrow :)"SWEET" dreams.
PS - you can pre order your copy of Pioneer Woman Cooks on Amazon NOW!

These are a few of my favorite things...

2009-08-25T14:05:00.000-07:00

I thought I should share some fun info with you...

WERE HAVING A PARTY

Who doesn't love or need some

Fun shoes a good smelling house, car and office

something cute to put your stuff in

and a great pair of jeans

Join us:
Saturday September 19
for a fun, fantastic PARTY!
Bring your friends, neighbors, sisters and their friends
More details to follow...
bet you can't wait!

July 24th

2009-08-21T22:58:00.000-07:00

Yes, I know that it is August 22, but I wanted to post this one...

Pioneer day has always been one of my favorite holidays. As a young child, my grandma (Gran) would decorate a parade float for all of the grandkids to ride in the North Logan parade. I remember riding to Salt Lake with my mom and Gran to Modern Display to get all the new glitz for the float. The North Logan parade is unlike any other. It's the BEST parade. Lots of thought and time goes into all of the floats, bike parade, and pioneer children singing and walking.

I don't know who any of these people are...just giving you an idea of what a great parade it is.

This was our float, so fun with ALL the cousins.

This years float theme was, "Days until the Pumpkin Walk." We love the Pumpkin Walk. My wonderful grandparents Wally and Ida Beutler started the Pumpkin Walk in Grandads fields years ago. Gran had a great love for Halloween, and wanted to create a fun, free family activity that people could attend on Halloween. The city of North Logan has since taken over it, and Nancy Israelsen helps carry on the tradition of something I hold very true and close to my heart.

My wonderful aunties have carried on the tradition of doing this for the great-grandchildren. My kids look forward to it each year. This year my sister was out of town, so she let me take Tristin and KarLee. They were so excited to throw the candy.

Aunt Marie, Aunt Diane, and Aunt Nan

We met afterwards at the Godfreys for yummy BBQ's, salads, treats and homemade kettle corn (thanks Aunt Diane). I come from a wonderful family of cooks.

It was great to see all my cousins and visit. LOVE YOU GUYS! Next year we are planning a reunion, and I am so excited! I love being with my family
just cousins, hangin out having a great time!

my cute cousin Rebecca, who is getting married in September. YEA - CONGRATS!

Thanks again to my wonderful family who reminds me how great of a heritage I come from.

the show down

2009-08-16T20:26:00.000-07:00

Ashton and Logan gave us a little show last night. Logan is one year YOUNGER than my little small fry! These boys were so cute, and as you can HEAR, everyone enjoyed the show.

Yes, that is my man, beat'n down his younger cousin! He comes at him with fightin fists, but stops to pose for mom. At the very end you can hear Logan give out a little "ouch."

Gittins Family Fun

2009-08-16T19:11:00.000-07:00

Due to the fact that the summer has been a little hectic... good 'ol Utah will have to do for our family vacation. It all started Tuesday night. I have never been to Chuck E Cheese (I know--- lame) but ya know, it's where a kid can be a kid. My girlfriend Kaehla and I took the kids, along with her niece and nephew Brian and JoAnn. It wasn't so bad, but I doubt we will be going again :) It's a glorified Fun Park. Id much rather Fat Cats in Ogden.

BFF's Jos and Maddy

Enjoying treats!

the whole gang - Ashton, Brian, JoAnn, Addy, Maddy and Jos - with Chuck E

We stayed the night at my cousin Margo's. She was so gracious to let me bring eight people into her home for a sleepover. We had a great time, made some great breakfast - set the smoke detector off, and even did some early morning shopping at Target.

We all went to Cherry Hill on Wednesday. I had never been there either - I know, can you even imagine! The kids had a great time, swimming for hours. The great thing...no one got burnt. Ashton was a little red on the tummy from laying on the lazy river all day.

He was just taking a small rest before going back down the slides

I played it safe, and put a shirt on him on day two. Kaehla, Brian and JoAnn went home Wednesday night, while the kids and I stayed another night with Margo. We went to the Gateway and did some shopping. The kids were so tired, they were happy to go to bed. Swimming wore them right out!

Thursday we did Cherry Hills again with Jaysons sisters and kids. We had such a great time playing with the cousins.

Amber and Addy

Jos and Maddy

Jaxon, Addy Logan and Ashton having a snack

The kids were a little worn out after two days of swimming. We stayed the night in Grantsville at Debbies house with all the cousins. I woke up early (did I mention that vacations are NOT for sleeping) to make Biscuits and Sausage gravy for everyone. We set off on our convoy to Park City early Friday afternoon. Jayson came with his parents.

Todd and Debbie got us reservations at the Westgate again, an it is such a fun place. We met everyone at the mountain and started with the Alpine Slide. Addy was a little upset that she had to drive herself this time, because she was too tall - seriously, Addy too tall? I think she was more afraid than anything. She did great, and had a smile at the end.

My favorite girls Jos, Addy and Maddy
Friday night the kids swam and ate Pizza while the adults went to Midway to the Zermatt to have Seafood Buffet. Do you all know how I feel about things that swim? NOT REALLY A FAN!But I was a good sport for all of those who enjoy it. Jayson was in heaven - I ate a whole lot of veggies and dessert. We laughed the entire time. Jayson learned how to speak Weeblish, his new own personal made up Jayson language. For those of you who know my husband - he is a large child who does not want to grow up. Maybe we should have taken him to Check E Cheese.

Good times riding in the back seat

Ashton and Jos hang'in in the hot tub

Addy with Cassidy and Emily and "George Washington" hair

Saturday we woke up to snow on the mt. caps and rain. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL! The girls and I went shopping, and Jayson hung out in the room with the boys. We played games, ate, laughed, ate more, ate, ate, did I mention that we were ALWAYS eating? GOOD food - just A LOT!

My little Diva in training.

Sunday morning we headed back up to the Mt. for the coaster ride. We played a little bit at the outlets, ate some more, and headed home...

HOME SWEET HOME!

shopping for the NEEDS

2009-07-31T21:46:00.000-07:00

Isn't she a beauty? Jayson knows how much I want a double oven - and a good one at that. Let's just say this new addition to our family ate more than half the appliance allowance...but we were planning on it! Jayson wanted me to have the very best since I love being in the kitchen so much.

This wasn't my first choice, but next in line. I wanted the french doors, but not a big fan of water on the door...but considering I got the double ovens, Jayson can have his ice and water :)

We spent ALL day looking at flooring, lighting, cabinets, and appliances. We purchased the ovens, microwave, fridge, hood vent, and garbage disposal. I wasn't set on the cook top I saw- so I'll keep searching. We signed our cabinet contract today, and picked out hardware. I'm having some mental problems wrapping my brain around the flooring. I felt like it was a pretty productive day, but damn...I'm worn OUT!

where did July go?

2009-07-28T10:54:00.000-07:00

I am at work, yes, not working...and all my pics are on my home computer - so they will have to come later!
What a month! It seems like it just started, and in a week it will be over. Our family has been busy liv'in the dream...what dream I'm not quite sure, but it's a good one.
Joslynn spent 2 weeks with her mom in St. George, mostly in the pool the entire time. She got back just in time for girls camp. Moms were invited for the first part. We took a tour of the Oqurriah Temple, and it was so great to share that experience with Joslynn. We then went to Temple Square and listened to the sister missionaries share some Hymns and their testimonies with us. The girls then had a short testimony meeting. We ate lunch at Lion House Pantry (mmmm), and then left for home. The girls stayed the night at a KOA, played games, ate food, and had fun! They spent the next day at the Salt Lake DUP Museum.
We celebrated my big-brothers birthday on July 4th up Blacksmith Fork. They purchased 30+ acres, and have named it the "Dragon Ass." Marni got Andrew a pool for his birthday, and the kids enjoyed it very much! I love spending time with my family. It was a great day to relax!
The 4-way inspection was done this morning, Drywall and sheeting starting tomorrow. Doors by Friday, and Windows and Siding next week. We are getting so very excited for a new house - just wish we didn't have to leave our neighbors and friends. ( I know, we are moving 2 WHOLE MILES, but it feels like the other side of the world. Our house is supposed to be done by Sept 1 - YIKES, 5 weeks away!
I just finished up a State Audit at Riverwalk with flying colors - whew! I hate audits. Went home at 4:30 with a migraine from the dark side. Jayson is still working out of town, so It's a little hard to function without him. He is in Fillmore (or the Fillmore beaver area as the joke goes), for ONE more week - yea right! That was the story last week.
Ashton took off his training wheels - and was OFF! NO HELP! Now...he wants a motorcycle. WHAT??? Ashton wasn't to be like the boys on Nitro Circus. He's my little Evil Knievel, and it freaks me out! Brady (our neighbor) brought over his Razor motorbike, and Ashton got on and rode off...no shoes, no helmet. This boy is gonna put me in the grave. Jayson went to KSL, and is determined to get him a motorbike and riding gear ASAP! AGHHH.
like they say, it's a crazy life, but it's mine.

if tomorrow never comes...

2009-07-01T15:17:00.000-07:00

Isn't it ironic how an event in our life can make us sober? My mishap with my girlfriend last Monday has made me think of a few things. I have wonderful friends, family, and an amazing husband!
"If tomorrow never comes, will they know how much I love them?"
Jayson has been working so hard at work, and doing "sweat equity" on the house on the side. Works been a little "much" lately, and I've been worried about him. He's not angry, or pissy...just...well, WARN OUT! He slept in Sunday morning till 10:30 - THIS NEVER HAPPENS! This man wakes up at 5:30 just to make breakfast each weekend.
Last weekend I went out with the girls to Salt Lake. We enjoyed a VERY expensive dinner at The Melting Pot, soooo much fun - and shopping and more eating on Saturday. Jayson kept the kids, happily, and still managed to frame the porch for the porch cap. When I got home the kids had went out to Grandmas, and Jayson and I spent some time at the house just talking.
Tuesday night I came home with a migraine. It's been awhile since I've had one that bad. He ran to Hyrum, got McDonald's for Addy and Ashton (Jos is visiting her mom), started a movie and went to help Steve haul hay. Came home, picked up, bathed kids and took out the trash and let me sleep. Yes, I slept from the time I got home until 7 this morning.
When I got to work, I noticed that one of my friends had posted a link to last nights Americas Got Talent, for a Mr. Kevin Skinner. *check it out on You Tube*
I started to cry..sob...bawl! This guy is good, but it was the song he sings.

Jayson - I just want you to know - If tomorrow never comes, I LOVE YOU! You are an amazing person. I know that I whine A LOT, about A LOT, and forget sometimes that you are the one thing that still keeps me in my place and smiling! You go to work everyday so that we have have what we need/want. I know that every marriage has it's storms, and we have endured many - but the sun keeps coming back. I loved you then, I love you now!
PJ

Life is like a box of Chocolates

2009-06-25T08:38:00.000-07:00

Whenever a box of chocolates is put in front of me, I immediately see if it has a map on/or in the box to guide me to my choice. IF the stupid thing has no map I pick up a MILK chocolate, turn it upside down, dig a small hole in the bottom to check out what's inside. If it's not what I want, I simply place it back in the box, and move to the next option. I'm sure you can only imagine how much everyone loves eating the box of chocolates after I have gone through them.
How great would life be if we could made the same choices? Just simply put back what you don't like or want and move on! Too bad that's not how it works.
I love my life - the ups, downs and in-between. The downs can REALLY suck, but I try to made the ups outweigh them.
recent down: In the last week, the only thing that has been done on my house is the framing of the shop. EIGHT WORKING DAYS PEOPLE - that's like a MAX. 2 day job. The trusses, and power source were delivered yesterday - BUT NO WORK! AGHHH! THE POSITIVE to this... We are still getting a new house, just maybe not at the assumed date expected. Maybe I'm wrong, maybe this is all part of the contractors plan.
another down: I hurt one of my friends, not intentionally! I didn't realize how much I had hurt her. Our friendship is over - yes, that bad! She was so angry with me, that I couldn't even talk to her. It has hurt all week, and I just want to make it better - but I don't think this one can be fixed. I can't imagine not talking to her again - but I am going to use it as a learning lesson to appreciate and listen more to those around me. I took advantage of her and her wonderful friendship - and I don't want to ruin another friendship.

My kids are my world, and I love them so much. I don't think I take the time to snuggle them, or love them like I should. I kissed Ashtons sweet face this morning as I picked him up out of bed. My little Addy calls me THE MINUTE she pulls herself out of bed to tell me good morning, and what she should do today. Jos is on her way to the Temple to watch some children, while a marriage is performed. What a beautiful, wonderful life!
My husband, my love - I have tortured and tried this man - and "for better or for worse" he still loves me. Last Friday he sent me flowers...NO REASON, just an I love you! He puts up with me day in and day out, and still kisses me goodnight.

Life IS like a box of chocolates! You never know what your gonna get. We have to figure out our life, learn form it, and use it for our future. Living each day if it were our last. Making peace with others, and loving whole heartily.
This week has been one of those learning experiences that I hope to grow from, and live today a little better.
To those of you reading - thank you. Thank you for blog-stalking me!:) Don't be afraid to leave a comment. Thank you for being interested and reading to the end. I hope that you are reading this because somewhere in our life, we became friends. Enjoy your day, love longer, laugh harder, and enjoy life!

The WONDERFUL Men in my life

2009-06-20T22:43:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY babe,

I LOVE YOU!

Wishing a Happy Birthday to Wade and Jeremy too.

To OUR PERSONAL SUPERMAN, DAD, and Husband

the WONDERFUL FATHERS of this world,

especially mine...

and Jayson's Dad

We love you ,

HaPPy FaTheR's DaY!

she'll never know

2009-06-18T11:46:00.001-07:00

I took this pics Monday morning before Jos left for trek. She made me promise I wouldn't put them on facebook, but my Blog doesn't count! Jos totally fell in love with her Ma and Pa, The Dymocks. They are wonderful people, and I was excited she got to spend her trek with them.

They stayed in the same clothes the entire time, so needless to say, she was a little stinky when she got home.

She got home about 9 last night from trek, exhausted and high on life. They only got rained on Tuesday night and Wednesday. During lunch Wednesday the "pony express" delivered letters to the trekkers. These of course were previously written by parents. It took me about two weeks to write this letter to Jos. I wanted her to know how much I loved her, and how important the choices we make affect our lives. (I still have the letter my dad wrote me when I was 16). So, about 10 this morning I get a text from Jos that reads...

"hey I love you. going on the trek made me realize how much u do for me. the entire time i couldn't wait to tell u what we did and i found myself counting down till i could see my family. i got homesick and it drove me crazy. im so glad im home. thank u so much i love you and have a super fabulous day at work!
I know, wipe the tears! She is such a sweet girl, and I love her so much!

just another week

2009-06-14T17:34:00.000-07:00

Monday I started a new diet, I know, aren't we always on a diet! I am trying Alli. This is the one where if you eat to much fat, you'll end up in the bathroom... Well, it's been one week and I must know my fats, because I'm doing great! I also brought this lovely scale - I HATE SCALES! My family has been weighing themselves everyday. Maybe this was not such a good addition.

Joslynn went to the Orthodontist, Dr. Gymon. She is getting braces on June 22, and is SO excited. I don't think she is aware of the pain she is about to encounter. After the appointment, I took the kids to Lagoon. We bought season passes again. It really works out. I love going, knowing that we don't have to stay all day because we can just go back another day. Addy is finally tall enough to go on every ride, but Joslynn couldn't bribe her to go on Wicked. She said she will before summer is over.
Tuesday I got a surprise visit from my boss. Gotta love those days. I apartment shop my competitors, and usually "dress down." He had to come when I was 30 min late, and wearing jeans! I have a great boss however, and we had a good visit.
Wednesday I had a resident party. Jake the Fireman came to Riverwalk to talk to the kids about water and fire safety. They all seemed to enjoy it.

Thursday seemed to drag on forever. I'm sure it had something to do with all the rain. I was a little bummed do to the fact that work was not being done on my house in the rain.
Friday was just warm enough for the upstairs to get MOSTLY framed in. Just a little left, with trusses by next Friday. Jayson and his buddies poured the shop floor Friday night.

This is the view from our back door. Isn't it beautiful?
Rear view of the house

Saturday we spent the day at home...BORING! I hate just sitting around. The house was clean by 10, and I had nothing to do. I finally convinced Jayson to drive to Garland and see the puppy we are getting his dad for Fathers Day. We ate at the Pie Dump, If you haven't been, you need to go! Then we went to pick out a puppy. Isn't she CUTE? She is a "bug" Boston Terrier/Pug. She's brindle colored, with a white paw and white chest.
Jay is going to be so excited. He is retired, and needs a shop dog to keep him company. I think this little girl will do just the trick. Jayson is pretty sure we need one too, but I'm PRETTY sure one dog is just enough!

Today consisted of getting up to make these Chocolate Turtle Cookies for Jayson. I can't tell you what they actually tasted like, so I would feel guilty telling you they were good. All I have is an empty plate...so I guess they were good!

Jill and Josh spoke in sacrament meeting, along with Joslynn. Jos talked on baptism, and did a great job. Sam, Judy, Jill, Josh, Dad, and Steve came over for Lasagna dinner. However, the new diet limits the ability to eat to much fatty foods, so lots of salad, but NO dessert! Dad showed up with Magic Cookie Bars, Judy with Rhubarb Cake, and I had made cookies and Triple Berry Coffee Cake... No DESSERT SUCKED!

Jill and Josh listening to story time.

Judy put Dad and Sam to sleep while reading to Addy.

What a great week! Joslynn is off to Keepers of the Faith, Stake trek in the morning. She's pretty nervous. I am so excited to hear all about it Wednesday night.

Peanut Butter Heaven on earth

2009-06-07T20:09:00.000-07:00

First off...a special thanks to my girl Celeste for our FABULOUS family pictures! More to come, but I did add the one at the top of the page. She did an awesome job last Sunday afternoon. You can check out her blog @ www.amomentwithceleste.blogspot.com, or follow her link on the sidebar.

As many of you know, when I get stressed I usually cook. The previous post may have pointed out some of those issues. This weekend included some great new choices. The ONE that I am going to tell you about today is-

Peanut Butter Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookies!

Cream together:
1 C. Margarine
1 1/2 c. Brown Sugar
2 C. Sugar

Add:
6 eggs
1/2 Tbs. vanilla
4 tsp. baking soda
3 1/4 C. Creamy Peanut Butter
mix well

Add:
9 C. Rolled Oats
1 pkg. chocolate chips
1/2 bag (6 oz) m&m's

Bake @ 350 for 15 min. Makes 6 Doz. LARGE cookies

In other news, the house is coming along great. A little water never hurt anything! The upstairs is my GREAT room/kitchen, our bedroom, piano room and laundry.
All three kids bedrooms are in the basement along with a family room.

can anyone hear me?

2009-06-05T22:45:00.000-07:00

FIRST OFF - The camera has been found! YEA!

This blog is one of those, that I really need to babble. So for those who do not wish to hear my sad sorry, please exit now. If you are interested in a self wallowing story...please read on.

I have a beautiful daughter, Joslynn. Joslynn came into my life with her father. Jos turned 5 in August and Jayson and I started dating in October. I loved her from the very beginning like she was my own. She came from a broken family of a broken family. Her mom comes from a rough background (don't really need to tell that story. any of you who know me already know that one), and It has greatly affected Joslynn.
When Joslynn was 10, we got custody of her. It was the best thing to happen. We were so excited. New house, new baby(Ashton) and Jos got to stay with us! Her mom had decided to move to Mesquite and "let her stay" with us (that's the G rated version). Christy left behind two beautiful girls (another from her other failed marriage) and two x-husbands. She left the state to find what she had been missing.
Jos and I are only 15 years apart. My oldest sis and youngest sis are 16 yrs apart - so I have always concluded that we are like sisters. I try really hard to be a good parent, but sometimes I feel as If I am failing. I don't want to cross a line of the evil step-mother, but I swear anything I do makes me that. Ya know - When you only have one set of parents to blame - you can't really do anything about it. But when your step mom makes you mad you can throw the whole, I could go live somewhere else thing out there. I remember telling my mom that I was gonna go live with my birth mother - A woman I had NEVER met, but when I was mad It sounded good.
Jos is a TOTAL teen - and I remember those years WAY to vividly. My mom and I did NOT get along, in fact my dad would often ask if he needed to put the Ref shirt on. HAD I KNOW NOW, WHAT I KNEW THEN...I would have embraced every day I had with my mom.
It's one of those things you hope you can teach your children but unfortunately they have to learn at their own pace. My time was cut short, and I often cry myself to sleep wishing I could just take back even one of those days.
So, I sit here, tonight, while everyone is asleep crying it out on to this damn computer hoping that It will make me feel better, and that I will know that Joslynn is just being a normal teenage girl, and "this too shall pass." My mom would always make me feel better about this, but she's not here to do that anymore!
IT'S SO FREAKIN STUPID that we have to fight because I am to proud to let her win the fight. The fight you ask...oh yes, that would be the one about keeping my house clean. You see, Jos and Addy spent the night with Aunt Buffy last night. I got up this morning at 5 - did my workout, started some laundry, swept,cloroxed the bathroom, spot mopped, did the dishes, had my shower,realized Ashton wet the bed, stripped his sheets, showered him, started another load of laundry and was out the door at 8:30. Stopped to check on the building progress, dropped Ashton off, got to work. Yelled at my maintenance guy, worked on files, solved the worlds problems (tenants that think I am also a marriage and family therapist), moved in two new families, had a visit with Mr. Police Officer about my tenants, grabbed some groceries, and headed home to cook dinner...to find what...MY HOUSE A MESS! They had gone swimming last night, and ALL the swimming stuff was in a sack sitting on the floor right in front of the door. Wet towels, wet suits mixed with jammies and yesterdays clothes. It's so stupid, I know...but It's Friday, and my house was clean when I left! Apparently all the little friend and neighbors spent the day at my house. Don't get me wrong I LOVE EVERYONE at my house (it's why the kitchen/family room is the biggest one in my new house) - but could they please just clean up the mess? Why is this Joslynns problem...IT'S NOT, but I yelled at her because she is the oldest, and should know that this kind of shit really lites the fire under my *%@!
Okay, so now I'm sobbing out of control, because I am the OCD FREAK that would rather have my house clean, than a happy teenage daughter. W. T. H. is my problem?
Maybe I just need a really good cry, maybe I need to get back on my anxiety meds, maybe my girls weekend can't come fast enough, or maybe... just maybe I should go to sleep and it will all be better in the morning? NO... I still have 2 more loads of laundry, and dinner dishes. But it will get better, I know it will! I just wish my mom was here to tell me that!
For all of those who have a mother...LOVE THEM EVERY DAY! I should follow my own advice with Joslynn and just LOVE her. I get so frustrated with her mom, and I take it out on her. It's not her fault, and I just want to SCREAM at Christy! (I'm keepin this G rated and it's KILLIN me).
For now, I should stop, let it go, and take it out on the really dirty spaghetti sauce pan. Maybe I do feel better, writing therapy. It's late, and the later it gets, the heavier the tears. The house is quiet, everyone is asleep, and I have consumed an entire roll of toilet paper with my snot and tears.

I am lost, and can't be found!

2009-06-05T08:44:00.000-07:00

On Sunday, we went to get our family pictures done. I remember taking my camera with me to sneak a few shots, but never took it out of the car. Afterwards we went to the new Disney movie, Up! Well...now I can't find my camera! THIS IS NOT OKAY. They have started framing the house, I have been to three graduations, the kids went to the last day of school, were going to the Air Show tomorrow...and I HAVE NO CAMERA! I, for the life of me can not find my cute little green friend. I am feeling very sad, and naked since it travels in my purse at all times. (yes, my camera is lime green.)
I am offering a reward to my kids, $5 if they can find my camera today. Until then...

The Big Pour

2009-05-30T18:39:00.000-07:00

We are so lucky to have such good friends! Jayson and the boys were on the site at 7:30 this morning, waitin for mud. They did an awesome job. All I had to do was keep them hydrated and feed them after. THANKS to My baby, Stump (The one and only JAYSON GITTINS), Vulva(Sammy), Pisser( Justin), Jonsey (Jody), Fee Fee (Jody N),D-Vo (Dev), Red (Darrin), and J-BO (Jason). YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST!!!
next on the list, framing. It's actually gonna look like a house!

memories

2009-05-28T14:17:00.000-07:00

Christmas 2008 we were lucky enough to take Joslynn and Addy to San Diego, and Anaheim CA. for a family vacation. We stayed right on the ocean front, went to Sea World, San Diego Zoo, and Disneyland. I have ALWAYS loved these pictures.

This is my Addy screaming into the waves, "come on, bring it to me!"

Joslynn looking on like, holy crap, they are coming...

I love this one. The girls got a little far and were surprised when they couldn't out run the waves. The look on Joslynns face is priceless. I think it captures the innocence of a child. Truly living in the moment of happiness and tranquility. When I see this it makes me cry a little, I know...sappy!

The girls loved the ocean, and I was sad we couldn't spend more time playing. We have often talked about going on a vacation, just to San Diego. Disneyland is just too hard with a tiny one, and I don't think you get your full benefit. I would go to Disneyland every year, if financials could allow for it. I will be that grandma that takes the grand-kids to Disneyland every year, just so I can go. It's the one advantage of having kids so young, getting your grand kids at a young age. Jayson and I are not having anymore children, so I am totally excited for grand babies...not that I am rushing ANY of my children to have babies!

Wow, went off on kids for a minute...sorry about that...random thoughts. I think this entire blog is some random rambling.

When we were at Jills wedding dinner at the Jensen Historical Farm last Saturday, Ashton found a sea shell. He puts it in the tub with him every night, so that it will grow. It is so cute how his little 4 yr. old mind works....water it, it will grow. He then asked me if I would take him to the Ocean for his birthday (in November), so that we could find a bigger shell since his won't grow.
Jaysons sister had invited us to go on a family cruise with them, before her son goes on a mission next spring, and I think after looking at these pictures again, and Ashton wanting to see the Ocean...I'm pretty sure we will be going! Now I have totally excited myself about something that won't even happen for another year!
We have already started saving $$$, and I am so excited! Yea for us...in a year...haha! I'm crack'in myself up!

This entry was a little scattered, so I apologize to any of those reading it! It was supposed to be all about Ashton and his sea shell that wouldn't grow. I don't think that's how it worked out. hmmm...maybe I shouldn't have drank two cokes at lunch!

What a beautiful day!

2009-05-27T06:52:00.000-07:00

Saturday was finally the big day for my cousin Jill. She looked gorgeous in her dress, and don't forget the shoes. Every girl needs the perfect shoes for the perfect day. Jill had a pair of whites for the temple, and the most amazing red ones for the dinner!

Josh and Jill were married in the Logan LDS Temple. It was an absolutely BEAUTIFUL day! The sky was blue and the temp was just right.

Addy has this mild obsession with weddings, flowers, dresses, and cakes. She was so excited when Jill invited us to the temple for family pictures. At first Addy was not going to be able to go to the lunch afterwards, too many adults, but then just enough couldn't make it that a spot was available for Addy. You would have though she was going to the grand ball. She was Jill's little shadow as much as I would allow. I even had to pull her away from Jill when they were greeting guests. I think maybe Addy should be a professional Wedding Planner when she grows up.

CONGRATULATIONS JILL, we love you!

Dough everywhere

2009-05-26T15:46:00.000-07:00

This weekend was a busy baking weekend for me. I love baking, and had found some new ideas to try out. Friends and family joke that Jaysons on the grill, I'm baking, and were both trying at the cooking thing.
Jayson has been working out of town, and was home for the weekend. The kids had planned on selling doughnuts Monday morning, hoping to get all the campers and visitors in town for the holiday weekend.
I had found a recipe for "overnight" cinnamon rolls, and though this would be great. I would make them Sunday night, and It would make Monday go a little easier...hmmm...These suckers were awful! I thought something was up with the amount of liquid used, but I just stuck to the recipe. The dough was so tough, my Kitchen Aide was even having a hard time. I finished them anyways...maybe the final product was going to turn out.
I have a wonderful recipe for spudnuts/ cinnamon rolls, and I think I will just stick to that one.
I did however have HUGE success with the Buttermilk Rolls! The only thing that sucked about these is that the time consumption is a little more than I would like. You start with yeast, flour and buttermilk - let that sit for 2 HOURS, add more, and let that sit for another hour. Plus, with rolls you have to cut and shape. So the whole process took over 4 hours - but they were SOOO GOOD! Totally worth the wait. As many of you know, it rained Sunday...and rained...and got cold...and rained....and I would care because - THIS SUCKS FOR DOUGH!!
We turned the furnace off at our house like 2 months ago, and I wasn't about to fire it up again, but I should have. It would have made the day easier.
Sunday night, I went to bed about 2am, and couldn't sleep thinking about my morning of doughnuts. When the alarm went off at 5:30, I wanted to throw it across the room. A nice hot shower started the day for me. I got my milk scalding, and yeast rising and jumped in the shower. I was in full baking mode by 6am.
The recipe I use calls for 12C. flour - and i was still super sticky at 13 (almost 14). So, I decided to just work what I got. This dough was out of control. Talk about "active yeast." I couldn't roll out doughnuts quick enough... but we managed, and they sold. We made 6 doz. doughnuts, and 3doz cinnamon rolls. Cleaned up and put away by eleven!
The pictures do no justice, but I will give you the secret ingredients. Just a little FYI - there is a reason that these are easier with 2 people! 1 Fry's, the other cuts and dips...I promise! This is a full batch. If you have never made doughnuts before, or only want to TRY them - ONLY do 1/4 of this batch! A full batch makes a LARGE 5-6 doz. doughnuts

* I call them doughnuts, but they are in fact technically SPUDNUTS. Why you ask, because they are made with mashed potatoes!*

Spudnuts

Dissolve:
7 T yeast
1 1/2 C warm water
1 tsp. sugar

Mix:
3/4 C heaping sugar
1 stick + 2 T softened Butter
2 C Mashed Potatoes

Add:
4 C Scalded milk
4 eggs (room temp)
2 tsp salt

DO NOT add yeast until milk has been cooled, or it will kill your yeast

Add:
Yeast
6 C. flour
Use dough hook with Kitchen Aid and mix, slowly add 6 more cups flour (12 total)
Knead with dough hook for 7 minutes, Roll onto floured surface.

Frying: So I will admit here, I am not sure what temp you fry for! I think the norm is 375. All I know is that we heat the oil, test a doughnut hole, and keep the temp at medium. You may need to add more oil, or even change it during frying. You should only fry for about 1 min per side, otherwise the doughnuts are full of oil and are just plain nasty! If you fry to quick, the still have dough in the center...again, good luck!
We take them out of the oil, put on a paper towel for about 1 min, then dip in glaze on let rest on a cooling rack with wax paper underneath (quicker clean-up).

Glaze:
3-4 lbs. powdered sugar
1 cube melted butter
1/2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. vanilla
1 Tbsp. milk

Kaehla is such a good fryer. If you can see - were just frying them in an old pan - nothin fancy here!

Our favorite is the doughnut holes! We save those for loved ones...LOL!

I know - you can't see all the ooey gooey mess all over my hands, but the flour on my shirt is awesome. I'm not sure what the point of my apron was!

For Cinnamon Rolls:
Follow the above recipe, just roll out into a 1" thick piece instead of frying. I usually do this in three sections.
Roll this goodness all over top of the dough
Whisk together:
1 stick melted butter
1 Tbs. Cinnamon
1/3 C Brown sugar
1 Tbs. flour
Roll into cinnamon rolls, cut into even sizes. Line into baking pan, let rise until doubled. Bake at 350 for 20-25 min.
Pour glaze over the top while still hot!

If you decided to give these a whirl, good luck and HAVE FUN!

Doughnuts

2009-05-24T10:24:00.000-07:00

Just a little info for ya'll...
Kaehla and I will be up at the butt crack of dawn making doughnuts and cinnamon rolls (Monday) . My kids sell them on the corner, so please, stop in...
I'll post all about it tomorrow :)

HOUSE UPDATE

2009-05-22T23:10:00.000-07:00

The first pour was so exciting. Todd called me at work to tell me that Johnsons would be at the site at 11:30. So I grabbed my maintenance guy for lunch at the Crack, and then stopped to take pictures. I'm a little crazy with the camera, and I'm not sure what I do with all these pictures when we are done. Most people take pics to remember, or help with future ideas. Were only two weeks into this sucker, and I gotta just a few (hundred) pics!

This "hole" thing is kinda scary. You look at it one day, and think it's huge. Then they pour concrete into it, and now it's too small...and then everyone tells you that's just how it works, and it really IS big! ? The barn looks bigger than the garage. - I guess that's okay, then all my "stuff" can go in it instead of the garage, don't tell Jayson!

They poured out footings and foundation last week. Underground plumbing this next week, and then flat work. Jayson and his buddies will pour the basement floor, garage, and "barn" floor next Saturday. Jayson is working out of town, so we have to wait until Saturday ( May 30
JAYSON...WOW, what a worker! He takes all the extra hours he can get, plus works out of town, just to give me things I want for this new house! We've got a new beautiful canopy bed, Joslynns Queen bed, mattress', my Bosch washer and dryer, next on the list is my double ovens and range top. He is a dedicated worker, and only complains minimally. For those of you who really know Jayson...he's doing it all for the Rhino! :) We've wanted one for a few years, but the agreement was we had to be in our house first.

We'll see how this next week goes...

French Bread Pizza

2009-05-18T20:59:00.001-07:00

This recipe is typically best in the fall when harvest is on. All the veggies from the garden make this wonderful. However, I was craving it tonight! It's something out of the ordinary that my family loves. You can cut it into smaller servings as an appetizer, or as a main course. I used some smaller french loaves (pepperidge farm) this time, so it made 4 pieces.

1 Loaf French Bread - sliced in half
2 C. Alfredo Sauce
LOTS of Mozzarella Cheese
2 Lg. tomatoes
1 Zucchini
1 Yellow Zucchini
1/2 C. chopped fresh mushrooms
2 C. Tyson Fajita flavored cooked Chicken

Cut french bread in half, spread 1 C Alfredo on each piece, sprinkle cheese. Saute fresh veggies except tomatoes, just until tender. Layer on top of cheese. Add fresh tomatoes, chicken and more cheese.

Bake at 350 for 20 min, then broil just until golden

Happy cooking...