Life is like a box of Chocolates

Whenever a box of chocolates is put in front of me, I immediately see if it has a map on/or in the box to guide me to my choice. IF the stupid thing has no map I pick up a MILK chocolate, turn it upside down, dig a small hole in the bottom to check out what's inside. If it's not what I want, I simply place it back in the box, and move to the next option. I'm sure you can only imagine how much everyone loves eating the box of chocolates after I have gone through them.
How great would life be if we could made the same choices? Just simply put back what you don't like or want and move on! Too bad that's not how it works.
I love my life - the ups, downs and in-between. The downs can REALLY suck, but I try to made the ups outweigh them.
recent down: In the last week, the only thing that has been done on my house is the framing of the shop. EIGHT WORKING DAYS PEOPLE - that's like a MAX. 2 day job. The trusses, and power source were delivered yesterday - BUT NO WORK! AGHHH! THE POSITIVE to this... We are still getting a new house, just maybe not at the assumed date expected. Maybe I'm wrong, maybe this is all part of the contractors plan.
another down: I hurt one of my friends, not intentionally! I didn't realize how much I had hurt her. Our friendship is over - yes, that bad! She was so angry with me, that I couldn't even talk to her. It has hurt all week, and I just want to make it better - but I don't think this one can be fixed. I can't imagine not talking to her again - but I am going to use it as a learning lesson to appreciate and listen more to those around me. I took advantage of her and her wonderful friendship - and I don't want to ruin another friendship.

My kids are my world, and I love them so much. I don't think I take the time to snuggle them, or love them like I should. I kissed Ashtons sweet face this morning as I picked him up out of bed. My little Addy calls me THE MINUTE she pulls herself out of bed to tell me good morning, and what she should do today. Jos is on her way to the Temple to watch some children, while a marriage is performed. What a beautiful, wonderful life!
My husband, my love - I have tortured and tried this man - and "for better or for worse" he still loves me. Last Friday he sent me flowers...NO REASON, just an I love you! He puts up with me day in and day out, and still kisses me goodnight.

Life IS like a box of chocolates! You never know what your gonna get. We have to figure out our life, learn form it, and use it for our future. Living each day if it were our last. Making peace with others, and loving whole heartily.
This week has been one of those learning experiences that I hope to grow from, and live today a little better.
To those of you reading - thank you. Thank you for blog-stalking me!:) Don't be afraid to leave a comment. Thank you for being interested and reading to the end. I hope that you are reading this because somewhere in our life, we became friends. Enjoy your day, love longer, laugh harder, and enjoy life!

The WONDERFUL Men in my life

HAPPY BIRTHDAY babe,

I LOVE YOU!

Wishing a Happy Birthday to Wade and Jeremy too.

To OUR PERSONAL SUPERMAN, DAD, and Husband

the WONDERFUL FATHERS of this world,

especially mine...

and Jayson's Dad

We love you ,

HaPPy FaTheR's DaY!

she'll never know

I took this pics Monday morning before Jos left for trek. She made me promise I wouldn't put them on facebook, but my Blog doesn't count! Jos totally fell in love with her Ma and Pa, The Dymocks. They are wonderful people, and I was excited she got to spend her trek with them.

They stayed in the same clothes the entire time, so needless to say, she was a little stinky when she got home.

She got home about 9 last night from trek, exhausted and high on life. They only got rained on Tuesday night and Wednesday. During lunch Wednesday the "pony express" delivered letters to the trekkers. These of course were previously written by parents. It took me about two weeks to write this letter to Jos. I wanted her to know how much I loved her, and how important the choices we make affect our lives. (I still have the letter my dad wrote me when I was 16). So, about 10 this morning I get a text from Jos that reads...

"hey I love you. going on the trek made me realize how much u do for me. the entire time i couldn't wait to tell u what we did and i found myself counting down till i could see my family. i got homesick and it drove me crazy. im so glad im home. thank u so much i love you and have a super fabulous day at work!
I know, wipe the tears! She is such a sweet girl, and I love her so much!

just another week

Monday I started a new diet, I know, aren't we always on a diet! I am trying Alli. This is the one where if you eat to much fat, you'll end up in the bathroom... Well, it's been one week and I must know my fats, because I'm doing great! I also brought this lovely scale - I HATE SCALES! My family has been weighing themselves everyday. Maybe this was not such a good addition.

Joslynn went to the Orthodontist, Dr. Gymon. She is getting braces on June 22, and is SO excited. I don't think she is aware of the pain she is about to encounter. After the appointment, I took the kids to Lagoon. We bought season passes again. It really works out. I love going, knowing that we don't have to stay all day because we can just go back another day. Addy is finally tall enough to go on every ride, but Joslynn couldn't bribe her to go on Wicked. She said she will before summer is over.
Tuesday I got a surprise visit from my boss. Gotta love those days. I apartment shop my competitors, and usually "dress down." He had to come when I was 30 min late, and wearing jeans! I have a great boss however, and we had a good visit.
Wednesday I had a resident party. Jake the Fireman came to Riverwalk to talk to the kids about water and fire safety. They all seemed to enjoy it.

Thursday seemed to drag on forever. I'm sure it had something to do with all the rain. I was a little bummed do to the fact that work was not being done on my house in the rain.
Friday was just warm enough for the upstairs to get MOSTLY framed in. Just a little left, with trusses by next Friday. Jayson and his buddies poured the shop floor Friday night.

This is the view from our back door. Isn't it beautiful?
Rear view of the house

Saturday we spent the day at home...BORING! I hate just sitting around. The house was clean by 10, and I had nothing to do. I finally convinced Jayson to drive to Garland and see the puppy we are getting his dad for Fathers Day. We ate at the Pie Dump, If you haven't been, you need to go! Then we went to pick out a puppy. Isn't she CUTE? She is a "bug" Boston Terrier/Pug. She's brindle colored, with a white paw and white chest.
Jay is going to be so excited. He is retired, and needs a shop dog to keep him company. I think this little girl will do just the trick. Jayson is pretty sure we need one too, but I'm PRETTY sure one dog is just enough!

Today consisted of getting up to make these Chocolate Turtle Cookies for Jayson. I can't tell you what they actually tasted like, so I would feel guilty telling you they were good. All I have is an empty plate...so I guess they were good!

Jill and Josh spoke in sacrament meeting, along with Joslynn. Jos talked on baptism, and did a great job. Sam, Judy, Jill, Josh, Dad, and Steve came over for Lasagna dinner. However, the new diet limits the ability to eat to much fatty foods, so lots of salad, but NO dessert! Dad showed up with Magic Cookie Bars, Judy with Rhubarb Cake, and I had made cookies and Triple Berry Coffee Cake... No DESSERT SUCKED!

Jill and Josh listening to story time.

Judy put Dad and Sam to sleep while reading to Addy.

What a great week! Joslynn is off to Keepers of the Faith, Stake trek in the morning. She's pretty nervous. I am so excited to hear all about it Wednesday night.

Peanut Butter Heaven on earth

First off...a special thanks to my girl Celeste for our FABULOUS family pictures! More to come, but I did add the one at the top of the page. She did an awesome job last Sunday afternoon. You can check out her blog @ www.amomentwithceleste.blogspot.com, or follow her link on the sidebar.

As many of you know, when I get stressed I usually cook. The previous post may have pointed out some of those issues. This weekend included some great new choices. The ONE that I am going to tell you about today is-

Peanut Butter Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookies!

Cream together:
1 C. Margarine
1 1/2 c. Brown Sugar
2 C. Sugar

Add:
6 eggs
1/2 Tbs. vanilla
4 tsp. baking soda
3 1/4 C. Creamy Peanut Butter
mix well

Add:
9 C. Rolled Oats
1 pkg. chocolate chips
1/2 bag (6 oz) m&m's

Bake @ 350 for 15 min. Makes 6 Doz. LARGE cookies

In other news, the house is coming along great. A little water never hurt anything! The upstairs is my GREAT room/kitchen, our bedroom, piano room and laundry.
All three kids bedrooms are in the basement along with a family room.

can anyone hear me?

FIRST OFF - The camera has been found! YEA!

This blog is one of those, that I really need to babble. So for those who do not wish to hear my sad sorry, please exit now. If you are interested in a self wallowing story...please read on.

I have a beautiful daughter, Joslynn. Joslynn came into my life with her father. Jos turned 5 in August and Jayson and I started dating in October. I loved her from the very beginning like she was my own. She came from a broken family of a broken family. Her mom comes from a rough background (don't really need to tell that story. any of you who know me already know that one), and It has greatly affected Joslynn.
When Joslynn was 10, we got custody of her. It was the best thing to happen. We were so excited. New house, new baby(Ashton) and Jos got to stay with us! Her mom had decided to move to Mesquite and "let her stay" with us (that's the G rated version). Christy left behind two beautiful girls (another from her other failed marriage) and two x-husbands. She left the state to find what she had been missing.
Jos and I are only 15 years apart. My oldest sis and youngest sis are 16 yrs apart - so I have always concluded that we are like sisters. I try really hard to be a good parent, but sometimes I feel as If I am failing. I don't want to cross a line of the evil step-mother, but I swear anything I do makes me that. Ya know - When you only have one set of parents to blame - you can't really do anything about it. But when your step mom makes you mad you can throw the whole, I could go live somewhere else thing out there. I remember telling my mom that I was gonna go live with my birth mother - A woman I had NEVER met, but when I was mad It sounded good.
Jos is a TOTAL teen - and I remember those years WAY to vividly. My mom and I did NOT get along, in fact my dad would often ask if he needed to put the Ref shirt on. HAD I KNOW NOW, WHAT I KNEW THEN...I would have embraced every day I had with my mom.
It's one of those things you hope you can teach your children but unfortunately they have to learn at their own pace. My time was cut short, and I often cry myself to sleep wishing I could just take back even one of those days.
So, I sit here, tonight, while everyone is asleep crying it out on to this damn computer hoping that It will make me feel better, and that I will know that Joslynn is just being a normal teenage girl, and "this too shall pass." My mom would always make me feel better about this, but she's not here to do that anymore!
IT'S SO FREAKIN STUPID that we have to fight because I am to proud to let her win the fight. The fight you ask...oh yes, that would be the one about keeping my house clean. You see, Jos and Addy spent the night with Aunt Buffy last night. I got up this morning at 5 - did my workout, started some laundry, swept,cloroxed the bathroom, spot mopped, did the dishes, had my shower,realized Ashton wet the bed, stripped his sheets, showered him, started another load of laundry and was out the door at 8:30. Stopped to check on the building progress, dropped Ashton off, got to work. Yelled at my maintenance guy, worked on files, solved the worlds problems (tenants that think I am also a marriage and family therapist), moved in two new families, had a visit with Mr. Police Officer about my tenants, grabbed some groceries, and headed home to cook dinner...to find what...MY HOUSE A MESS! They had gone swimming last night, and ALL the swimming stuff was in a sack sitting on the floor right in front of the door. Wet towels, wet suits mixed with jammies and yesterdays clothes. It's so stupid, I know...but It's Friday, and my house was clean when I left! Apparently all the little friend and neighbors spent the day at my house. Don't get me wrong I LOVE EVERYONE at my house (it's why the kitchen/family room is the biggest one in my new house) - but could they please just clean up the mess? Why is this Joslynns problem...IT'S NOT, but I yelled at her because she is the oldest, and should know that this kind of shit really lites the fire under my *%@!
Okay, so now I'm sobbing out of control, because I am the OCD FREAK that would rather have my house clean, than a happy teenage daughter. W. T. H. is my problem?
Maybe I just need a really good cry, maybe I need to get back on my anxiety meds, maybe my girls weekend can't come fast enough, or maybe... just maybe I should go to sleep and it will all be better in the morning? NO... I still have 2 more loads of laundry, and dinner dishes. But it will get better, I know it will! I just wish my mom was here to tell me that!
For all of those who have a mother...LOVE THEM EVERY DAY! I should follow my own advice with Joslynn and just LOVE her. I get so frustrated with her mom, and I take it out on her. It's not her fault, and I just want to SCREAM at Christy! (I'm keepin this G rated and it's KILLIN me).
For now, I should stop, let it go, and take it out on the really dirty spaghetti sauce pan. Maybe I do feel better, writing therapy. It's late, and the later it gets, the heavier the tears. The house is quiet, everyone is asleep, and I have consumed an entire roll of toilet paper with my snot and tears.

I am lost, and can't be found!

On Sunday, we went to get our family pictures done. I remember taking my camera with me to sneak a few shots, but never took it out of the car. Afterwards we went to the new Disney movie, Up! Well...now I can't find my camera! THIS IS NOT OKAY. They have started framing the house, I have been to three graduations, the kids went to the last day of school, were going to the Air Show tomorrow...and I HAVE NO CAMERA! I, for the life of me can not find my cute little green friend. I am feeling very sad, and naked since it travels in my purse at all times. (yes, my camera is lime green.)
I am offering a reward to my kids, $5 if they can find my camera today. Until then...